Life isn‘t always sunshine and rainbows.
Sometimes it downright sucks.
We feel miserable and as though we’re going nowhere in life.
Our jobs aren’t satisfying. Our marriage is on the rocks. Money is so tight that we’re living from paycheck to paycheck. Kids are having problems.
Everything is such a mess that the only way to describe our life is that it “sucks.” And we don‘t have a clue how to fix it.
Or perhaps none of these things are happening to you at all. You just have a deep, overwhelming feeling that your life sucks. Your life may actually be…okay. It’s just not at the level you thought it’d be at by now.
Whatever the reason may be, we all get to a point where we struggle to see the silver lining in our lives. We feel unfulfilled and alone. Usually, we’re able to get ourselves out of our funk, but at other times, it’s not so easy.
If you’re feeling stagnant and have no idea how to fix your life, continue reading. Below are 20 ways you can go from feeling helpless and purposeless to being in control.
Why does your life suck?
As you work toward getting out of this rut and having a new outlook on life, the first thing you need to do is figure out what exactly sucks about your life.
Sometimes we get stuck in these downward spirals, where we exaggerate our problems and allow them to affect or color all other areas of our life.
For example, maybe you’re having marital problems and you and your partner are going through a really difficult period.
This challenge is causing you to feel insecure. It’s affecting your self-worth. And all these negative feelings are bleeding into your job or your relationship with your kids.
This problem is consuming so much of your effort and mental space that it’s impacting how you feel about everything else. Your job might be fine. The kids are doing well. You even have enough money in the bank.
Everything else may be great…but your marital problems make it difficult to see what’s going right.
You may be seeing your life through the tainted lens of your troubled marriage. To prevent this from happening, perform some introspection. Analyze the different aspects of your life, and pinpoint exactly where your feelings are coming from.
If you’re not sure of where to start, here are some points for you to consider:
1. Your biology is at play.
Our biology plays a significant role when it feels like life sucks. Our brains are wired to scout for the bad stuff, a phenomenon psychologists call negativity bias. This means our minds naturally give more weight to negative experiences, fixating on perceived threats to ensure our survival.
Our biological goal of survival takes precedence over everything else.
So, when something terrible happens, our brains focus all our time and energy on handling that threat. As a result, we ruminate more on unpleasant events and use stronger words to describe them.
This bias toward negativity serves as a protective mechanism to keep us safe from potential dangers.
2. Your thoughts are negative.
Are you a glass-half-full or a half-empty type of person? Is your inner critic on high alert in your mind?
If your thoughts are mainly negative, it’ll be far more difficult to see your life in a positive light. Instead, you’ll focus on everything that’s going wrong, instead of seeing what’s going right. You may even perceive positive events in a negative light because of your fixed mindset.
With a negative mindset, it’s not surprising you think your life sucks. You’re merely agreeing with what your inner critic has been telling you all along.
3. You hate yourself.
You’re not a big fan of yourself.
It might sound weird to say it out loud, but deep down inside, you don’t like yourself. You think horrible thoughts about yourself and treat yourself worse than you’d treat an enemy.
Worse still, you let others treat you poorly too.
Outwardly, you might seem confident. Perhaps you’ve even fooled everyone else into thinking that you are. But the truth is, out of all the people you hate in the world, you hate yourself the most.
4. Your job sucks.
As a responsible adult, you take your financial obligations very seriously. You’ve got bills to pay, and people depend on you to take care of them. So, you do everything in your power to make sure there’s enough money for everything.
But you loathe your job. Every day you go to work, a piece of you dies inside.
Normally, you could manage your sucky job because the weekends are always just around the corner. But lately, once Friday afternoon rolls around, you start dreading Monday mornings.
You wish you could quit your job and do something else. But your bills and responsibilities won’t take care of themselves.
5. You don’t take care of your health.
Our overall health has a strong impact on our quality of life. We can’t neglect it without serious repercussions.
When we treat ourselves badly, we experience negative outcomes.
It sounds simple, but this is a difficult concept many of us struggle to grasp, and it can often take a health scare to wake us up.
But even before that point, our bodies often give us signs that something is wrong. We just fail to recognize those signs.
Sometimes that’s because we don’t understand that our health is more than just about our physical bodies. Our minds, emotions, and social well-being are critical to our overall health.
When we don’t feed our bodies what they need to function properly, our mental health becomes affected. If we neglect our mental health, it could impact our physical health. Our emotional health could impact our mental health, which in turn could affect our physical health, and so on.
It’s all a cycle where each part plays a critical role.
If you’re feeling as though your life sucks, check your health. Are you taking care of your body as you should? Could your feelings be the result of a physical, mental, emotional, or social crisis?
6. Your values and fundamentals are screwed up.
Are your values in alignment with your true self? Or are you living by values forced upon you by society, your family, or the environment?
Perhaps you’re chasing dreams that aren’t really yours. But since everyone else is buying a new car every two years, working high-pressure jobs, and having 2.5 kids, you find yourself doing the same.
It’s possible you think your life sucks because your values and fundamentals are all screwed up. They don’t align with who you truly are inside.
You’re unhappy because you’re living an inauthentic life. The worst part is, because you’ve been listening to others about the kind of life you should live, you’re not sure what kind of life you want to live. You don’t know what would make you happy.
7. You’re in a toxic relationship.
Your relationship with your significant other, friend, or family member is toxic. While there may be a lot of love and history between the two of you, you aren’t good for each other.
Your relationship dynamic is unhealthy, and it doesn’t bring out the best in either of you.
Being together is too much of a struggle. There’s always one argument or an issue that you’re trying to resolve. It’s one drama after another.
Or maybe you feed off each other’s bad traits. You just bring the worst out in each other. When you get together, you’re an angry, sexist bigot. When, on a normal day, you really don’t care how other people live their lives—it’s their life, their choice.
Sometimes, you can’t believe the words that are coming out of your mouth or the way you’re behaving.
The relationship is sucking the joy out of your life and turning you into someone you don’t recognize.
8. You’re in a toxic environment.
The environment you’re in is toxic. It could be your job or place of worship. Maybe it’s where you hang out.
In this scenario, it’s not just one person who is toxic, it’s a group of people. The entire setup/system is unhealthy.
Maybe the management style at your office is organized in a way that breeds pressure, unhealthy competition, micromanagement, and stress. Because it’s the system that is toxic, everyone else seems to be toxic as well.
Your colleagues may not be horrible people. They might just be stuck in a bad situation, much like you are.
In situations like this, it’s easy to feel as though you’re the odd one out. The toxicity, plus the feeling of isolation, all work together to make you feel as though your life sucks.
9. You fear taking risks.
You’re not happy with the life you’re living right now. But it’s the only life you’ve ever known. It’s familiar. It’s comfortable. You know what’s expected of you and what to expect.
The only thing missing is joy.
But your fears of taking risks and the unknown trump your desire for joy. Or at least it used to. More and more lately, your comfort zone has started feeling like a cage that is keeping you locked in one spot.
You want to step out, but that fear holds you back. You’d love to try something new, but once you take a step to do so, thoughts of everything that could go wrong come flooding into your mind.
Your comfort zone feels too small, but you just can’t get over your fear of taking risks.
20 Steps To Make Your Life Suck Less
Now that you have a clearer picture of the reason(s) why you feel as if your life sucks, it’s time to figure out how to get your life together.
You don’t have to feel empty and trapped. Below are 20 different ways to start rebuilding yourself today.
1. Look inside yourself and reflect.
First things first: start with some self-reflection. If you’re going to make any lasting change in your life, you’ve got to tackle your mindset and negative thought patterns.
As you reflect, ask yourself three questions:
- What is going well in my life?
- What am I learning?
- Where do I go now?
The first question will help you get out of the “everything sucks” funk you’re in. It’ll help you look at the good things in your life.
After you start to see your cup as half full, instead of half empty, the second question will help you see the good in the truly sucky aspects of your life.
For example, your boss may be the most toxic human being on the face of the earth, but his micromanagement style is teaching you how not to lead your team when you become the boss.
The final question will help you get action-focused. There might actually be a part of your life that sucks. Instead of sitting down and just ruminating over it, figure out how to fix it. Work out what your next steps are.
2. Love who you are.
Having self-love shapes how you view the world around you. When you don’t love yourself, it’s difficult to recognize the good things in your life.
In fact, you could be sabotaging the good things that come your way because you don’t believe you deserve them.
You need to work on improving your self-confidence and loving yourself. And one step you can take is to seek the support of a licensed therapist.
A therapist can help you identify the cause of your self-loathing. They can provide a safe space for you to explore your feelings and thoughts and offer valuable insights and guidance.
Together, you can work on building coping mechanisms to counteract negative thoughts when they arise.
You deserve love, happiness, and all the good things in life. Taking the time to love yourself and work on your self-confidence can have a profound impact on your overall well-being and how you navigate the world.
3. Focus on your breathing.
When life feels overwhelming and it seems like everything is going wrong, one powerful technique you can use to regain control of your thoughts and feelings is deep breathing.
Take a moment to pause.
Find a comfortable position and focus on your breath.
Breathe in slowly and deeply, feeling the air fill your lungs. Then exhale slowly, letting go of any tension or negativity. Concentrate on the sensation of air filling your lungs and then leaving your body.
This simple act can help calm your mind, reduce stress, and bring you back to the present moment.
As you focus on your breath, the negative thoughts will lose their grip, making space for clarity and a more positive outlook.
Incorporating this mindful practice into your daily routine can be a powerful tool in navigating life’s challenges with a clearer and calmer mind.
4. Focus on the how-tos and less on the whys.
When life feels like it sucks, it’s natural to get caught up in trying to understand why everything seems to be going wrong.
However, dwelling too much on the whys can often lead to a cycle of negative thoughts and self-blame. Instead, try shifting your focus to the how-tos.
Don’t get caught up in the reasons behind your current situation. Rather, concentrate on practical steps you can take to make things better. Break down your challenges into manageable tasks and create a plan of action.
By shifting your focus to how to make things better, you empower yourself to take control of your circumstances. While the whys might remain unanswered, embracing the how-tos opens the door to positive change and growth.
It’s not about having all the answers but taking one step at a time toward a brighter future. Focus on the how-tos and embrace the power of proactive problem-solving to bring positive change into your life.
5. Figure out what you can learn from your setbacks.
Setbacks are an inevitable part of life. When everything feels like it’s going wrong, it can be difficult to see any silver lining. While you feel like this, it’s essential to adopt a growth mindset.
See these challenges as opportunities for learning and growth. Take a step back and reflect on your setbacks—what can you learn from them? Ask yourself what lessons these experiences might hold for you.
There may be areas where you need to grow or develop new skills. Perhaps this situation is teaching you the importance of resilience or the value of having a support system.
Most setbacks carry an opportunity for growth and self-improvement. An obstacle can present a chance to gain valuable insights about yourself, your strengths, and areas for improvement.
Embrace these experiences as life’s teachers, guiding you toward personal development and resilience.
By analyzing your setbacks, you can discover patterns, habits, and attitudes that might be hindering your progress. Adopting a mindset of learning and curiosity can help you transform your setbacks into stepping stones toward a better future.
So, embrace the lessons your setbacks are teaching you. Use them as fuel to propel you forward when you feel like you’re in limbo.
Setbacks don’t define you. It’s how you learn from them and bounce back that truly matters.
6. Let it out of your head.
One way to break free from negative thoughts and feelings is to get them out of your head. Keeping it all bottled up can intensify the feelings of despair and isolation.
Instead, consider reaching out to someone close to you and talking it over. Sharing your thoughts and feelings with a trusted friend, family member, or therapist can provide a fresh perspective and a supportive ear.
Sometimes, simply verbalizing your challenges can help you gain clarity and find solutions you haven’t considered before.
Another way to release pent-up emotions is by writing about them in a journal. Pour your heart out onto the pages and let your thoughts flow freely without judgment.
This process can be incredibly cathartic. It can allow you to gain clarity and understanding of your emotions and experiences while also finding a sense of release.
Don’t keep everything bottled up inside. Getting your thoughts and feelings out can help ease the weight you’re carrying to create space inside for healing and moving forward.
7. Get physical.
One way to shake off negative thoughts and feelings is through physical exercise.
Get up and get moving!
When you engage in physical activity, like going for a walk, dancing, or playing a sport, your brain releases feel-good chemicals called endorphins. They are natural mood boosters that help lift your spirits and bring a sense of calm.
Getting active also helps to take your focus away from negative thoughts and redirect it to something positive. It’s like hitting the reset button on your mind.
Exercise might not magically solve all your problems, but it can do wonders when it comes to putting you in a better mood and improving your overall well-being.
So put on your favorite tunes and dance, or go for a brisk walk at the park—whatever gets you up and out.
Give it a try, and you might just find that breaking a sweat can help you overcome those “my life sucks” moments.
8. Accept and be okay with it.
Life is a wild ride. It has its ups and downs, just like a roller coaster. When life is going well, there’s a pep to your step. You’re on top of the world.
But when that roller coaster heads down, it can reach stomach-dropping lows.
Sometimes life sucks, and it’s natural to feel that way. But one thing you should remember during the tough times is that it won’t last. Change is always just around the corner.
So, when things get rough, take a deep breath and remember that it won’t be this way forever.
Reflect on what you can learn from this experience. Use it as an opportunity to grow and improve the areas of your life that need some attention.
Trust the process and keep pushing forward. Eventually, the tides will turn, and brighter days will come your way.
9. Stop being a victim.
When life is throwing lemons at you, it’s easy to fall into the victim mentality. But here’s the thing, you have the power to take control of your life.
Sure, life might be going to hell in a handbasket, but that doesn’t mean you have to allow it. You can decide you won’t let life happen to you anymore.
Even when it feels like everything is falling apart, you have the power to shape your future.
So, take control of your life, and steer it in the direction you want it to go. Start by identifying the areas that need improvement. Then take small steps toward change.
Life may suck right now, but you’ve got the strength and resilience to turn it around. The power to change your story lies within you.
It all starts with the decision to stop being a victim and start being the hero of your own life story.
10. Learn from your mistakes and don’t repeat them.
Mistakes happen. We’ve all made them. They’re part of the human experience.
Taking responsibility for our mistakes and learning from them is a crucial step toward personal growth and positive change.
Granted, acknowledging where we went wrong and understanding the consequences of our choices can be tough. But it can also be incredibly enlightening and critical to ensuring we never repeat those mistakes.
Reflect on the choices and actions that brought you to your current situation. Think about what led you to make those mistakes and how you could have handled things differently.
What lessons can you draw from those experiences?
Armed with this newfound wisdom and clarity, commit to not repeating the same blunders. Commit to making better decisions going forward.
It’s not about beating yourself up or dwelling on the past; it’s about acknowledging your mistakes, understanding their impact, and using that knowledge to shape a brighter future.
So, learn, grow, and let your mistakes become stepping stones on your journey toward a life that doesn’t suck.
11. Arrest your thoughts.
When your life seems to be on a downward spiral, it can be easy for your thoughts to become a tangled web of negativity. It’s crucial you arrest your thoughts and regain control over your perspective.
Pause for a moment and discern between what you imagine to be true and what is the actual reality.
Our minds have a way of exaggerating the negative aspects of our experiences. Sometimes what we perceive might not align with the truth.
Challenge the negative narratives and assumptions that are clouding your perception of what’s happening. Remember, our thoughts are not always an accurate reflection of the truth.
Strive to see the big picture.
When you arrest your thoughts and question their validity, you gain the power to redirect your focus toward more constructive and hopeful paths. This can help you get a more balanced and positive outlook on life.
Your thoughts have the power to shape your reality. Choose them wisely. Embrace a mindset that empowers you to rise above the suckiness.
12. Learn how to delay instant gratification.
Patience is a virtue that can be hard to practice. But one thing you need to remember is that real progress is rarely instant.
Whether it’s personal growth, career success, or building meaningful relationships, the journey toward improvement involves setbacks and slow progress.
Embrace the process, stay committed, and don’t get discouraged if things don’t change immediately.
Like a seed taking time to grow into a magnificent tree, the things worth having or achieving in life may require nurturing and perseverance.
Keep working toward your goals, even if progress seems slow. Small steps forward are still steps forward. Have patience and perseverance, knowing that every little action you take is contributing to your growth and improvement.
Your dedication and effort will eventually lead to positive change and a life that doesn’t suck.
13. Create a game plan.
If your life seems like a never-ending storm, it’s time for you to take charge. It’s time for you to create a game plan to make your life suck less.
Start by taking a look at your life and figuring out which area you want to focus on first.
What could you do to make this area not suck? What problem do you want to tackle head-on?
Once you’ve figured that out, set realistic goals to do just that.
To make sure your goals are achievable, break down your larger goals into small, manageable steps you can reach without too much effort.
Stay on track by keeping a record of your progress. Also, celebrate when you reach each milestone in your journey.
With a well-crafted game plan, small goals lead to big changes. As you take one step at a time, you’ll be on your way to creating a life that doesn’t suck.
14. Focus on the good.
It can be challenging to see the light at the end of the tunnel when you’ve hit rock bottom. But here’s a secret—hitting rock bottom can be a blessing in disguise.
Hitting rock bottom can serve as a powerful wake-up call. It can be the shake-up you need to get serious about rebuilding your life.
If you feel as though you’ve hit rock bottom, recognize the opportunity this experience is giving you. Focus on the good in this period of your life and be grateful for the things that don’t suck.
Because even in chaos, there are still blessings you can appreciate. Take a moment to acknowledge them, whether it’s a loving friend, a beautiful sunset, or a good cup of coffee. Look for the silver lining in your situation.
Celebrate your small victories. Give yourself credit for the resilience and courage you’ve displayed during this difficult time.
By shifting your focus to the positive, you create space for hope and healing. Embrace gratitude.
15. Face your problems head on.
Sometimes it’s easier to avoid our problems and pretend they don’t exist when everything seems to be spinning out of control. It can be tempting to just close our eyes and pray they magically disappear.
A more proactive approach is to face your problems head-on.
Take a deep breath, summon your courage, and confront the issues that are standing before you.
Ignoring them rarely works. Often it only makes the problem worse and gives it more power over your life and mind.
Remember, you have the power to overcome your obstacles and transform your circumstances.
By facing your problems head-on, you reclaim control of your life and set the stage for positive change. You go from being a victim to being a victor.
Embrace the challenges before you as opportunities for growth. Let them propel you toward a future that doesn’t suck.
16. Take regular mental health days.
Taking regular mental health days can be a lifeline to restoring your well-being. Who knows, perhaps not prioritizing your mental health is the reason that life feels overwhelming.
Set aside a day when you disconnect from social media and other distractions. Spend the time journaling and write about what you’re struggling with. Do something that gives you clarity and helps you process your thoughts and feelings.
Allow yourself to be vulnerable and honest with yourself. Use this as an opportunity to recharge, reflect, and refocus your energy.
Mental health days are not a luxury or a waste of time. They’re necessary for your overall well-being. Use them to help you navigate through the challenging times in life.
17. Try something new.
A good way to break out of your funk is to try something new. Stepping outside of your comfort zone and embracing new experiences can be the breath of fresh air you need in your life.
It doesn’t have to be something grand or extravagant. You could do something as simple as try a new hobby, explore a different genre of music, or join a local community group.
Trying something new not only adds excitement to your days but also opens doors to opportunities and personal growth.
When you embrace the unknown with an open mind, you might discover passions, skills, and connections that you never knew existed.
Life is full of possibilities. By venturing into the unknown, you pave the way to a life full of adventure.
18. Spend time with people you enjoy being with.
When life feels tough and everything seems to suck, spending time with people you genuinely enjoy being with can be a lifeline of support and positivity.
Surrounding yourself with positive, supportive, and uplifting individuals can work wonders for your well-being.
Just being around them can help you to stop feeling so isolated and remind you that you’re not alone.
Schedule some time to hang out with your support system. Share meaningful conversations, engage in activities together, and create cherished memories.
Embrace the warmth of your genuine relationships and lean on them for support.
Let the power of human connection remind you that even amid all the suckiness, you have love and laughter.
19. Get more sleep.
Are you getting enough sleep? If you’re not, that could be the reason you feel so hopeless.
Sleep deprivation can have a significant impact on your overall well-being and how you perceive life’s challenges.
When you’re not getting enough rest, your physical and mental health will suffer. This makes it harder to cope with stress and negative emotions.
Lack of sleep can lead to increased stress, irritability, and difficulty in managing emotions, making even the smallest setbacks feel overwhelming.
It’s during sleep that our bodies and minds recharge, repair, and process the day’s events. Prioritizing sleep and establishing a consistent bedtime routine can have a transformative effect on our outlook and overall quality of life.
So, create a conducive sleep environment, unwind before bed, and give yourself the gift of adequate rest.
You might be surprised at how much better you’ll be able to handle the suckiness of life when you’re well-rested and refreshed.
20. Fix your financial situation.
Money problems can be a significant source of stress and can quickly overwhelm every other aspect of life. Especially when there’s not enough money to take care of your needs, bills, and responsibilities.
When we’re struggling to make ends meet, facing mounting debts, or feeling financially unstable, it can create a constant cloud of worry and negativity.
Take the time to assess your financial health, create a budget, and identify areas where you can cut back on expenses. You could even seek advice from a financial advisor.
Developing an actionable plan to manage your finances and working toward your goals can bring a sense of control and relief.
But keep in mind that financial stability takes time and effort. With dedication and perseverance, you can work toward a more secure financial future.
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When life feels like it sucks, it’s important to remember that this is just a temporary phase. Each day brings new opportunities and a chance for things to improve. It’s okay to have a bad day; we all face challenges and setbacks.
Just like how it’s always darkest before the dawn, the toughest times often precede moments of growth and positive change.
Don’t be too hard on yourself. Embrace the ups and downs of life, knowing that every low point is an opportunity for growth and there are better days ahead.
By implementing these 20 tips, you can gradually transform your perspective and create a life that sucks less.
So, believe in yourself, keep pushing forward, and embrace the brand-new day that awaits you.
