10 Behaviors That Make You A Very Difficult Person To Deal With

Do you struggle with relationships? Do you find that other people tend to distance themselves from you? Or do they tell you that you’re stubborn or difficult?

It could be that you do have some qualities that make you a difficult person to deal with.

And that’s alright! We all have our flaws. Once we’ve identified those flaws, we can take steps to improve. In doing so, you can improve the quality of your mind, life, and relationships.

What are some signs that you’re a difficult person to deal with?

1. You have a constant need to be right.

A man and a woman are having a discussion indoors. The woman, with blonde hair, is sitting with her arms crossed and an unhappy expression. The man, with short hair, is sitting behind her gesturing with his hands and speaking. The background includes striped curtains.

There are few things more annoying than a person who won’t admit when they’re wrong. Essentially, refusing to admit you’re wrong shows others that you have no self-awareness, and if you do have self-awareness, that you don’t care about how others feel. It’s okay to admit when you’re wrong! It may be a struggle with how uncomfortable it can be, but it’s a normal, healthy thing to do. People will respect you more for it.

2. You are unwilling to compromise.

A woman with curly red hair and a light blue cardigan sits on a bed, looking to her left with a concerned expression. A man with short hair and a white t-shirt sits next to her but faces the opposite direction, appearing upset with his arms crossed.

All relationships require give and take. They require meeting in the middle. Many people have a hard time with that because compromise is often uncomfortable. Neither of you may be happy with the end result, but you accept it so you can move on. Still, you have to be willing to adapt to the needs and preferences of others. Their needs are important to them just as yours are important to you.

3. You have a negative attitude.

A woman with wavy, dark hair and wearing large, black-framed glasses is looking intently at the camera with a furrowed brow and slightly pursed lips. She is dressed in a black shirt with white polka dots. The background is a bright white.

Many people don’t want to deal with negativity in their personal lives. Yes, life is hard and there is plenty of negativity in the world. However, healthy people learn to create boundaries so they can deal with it on their terms. A negative attitude is a good way to find yourself outside of those boundaries. That’s not to say you need to be positive about everything. You don’t. But sometimes it’s better to just not talk about it or address it neutrally. Not every cloud has a silver lining and that’s okay.

4. You lack empathy.

A black and white image of two people inside a modern, arched hallway. A woman wearing a coat leans against a wall with her arms crossed and eyes closed. A man in a suit, also with arms crossed, stands nearby looking at her. The corridor features large window panes.

Empathy is the ability to consider or understand the feelings and perspectives of others. Many people make the mistake of thinking that they need to feel or understand where the other person is coming from to be empathetic. You don’t. Accepting another person’s thoughts and feelings is as simple as listening and not telling them they’re wrong. People who don’t feel accepted gravitate to people who are more accepting.

5. You are frequently hostile.

A group of five young adults is sitting on a park bench, engaged in conversation. They are casually dressed, and the background shows trees, grass, and a pathway. The individuals appear animated, with one gesturing while others listen and respond.

Disagreements happen. It’s inevitable between creatures as emotional as humans. However, a lot of things aren’t worth fighting about. They’re so inconsequential that they could just be shrugged off. Still, some people feel the need to fight with others over issues minor or major. No one wants to be around an angry person all the time. No one wants to get roped into arguments and conflicts regularly.

6. You are too controlling.

A woman in professional attire engages in a discussion with a man across a desk in an office setting. The desk has a laptop, a potted plant, and documents, including a colorful chart. The woman is gesturing, suggesting she's explaining or emphasizing a point.

There are some who try to control everything and everyone going on around them. Many people call them micromanagers. Most people do not want to be micromanaged. They have their own needs, thoughts, desires, and ways of doing things. No one wants to deal with a tyrant in their everyday life. People need to feel free to do as they will at their own discretion.

7. You are not a good communicator.

A woman with blonde hair, wearing a gray sweater, rests her head on her hand and looks pensive. A man in the background, who is out of focus, appears to be sitting with his arms crossed, wearing a blue and white striped shirt.

Communication skills are the foundation of every good relationship. That includes being able to listen without interrupting, allowing other people the space to speak, and paying attention when other people are talking. In casual conversation, everyone should have an opportunity to express themselves and contribute. People who don’t will often find that no one wants to talk to them anymore.

8. You are inflexible.

Two women are indoors having a conversation. One woman with brown hair and wearing a red patterned top looks away, while the other woman with wavy hair and wearing a checkered button-up shirt makes a gesture with her hand, appearing a bit skeptical or bemused.

Life is chaos. Things happen. Sometimes the best-laid plans get blown to bits because of unforeseen circumstances. Flexibility is an important skill that everyone needs. You need to be able to accommodate and change when things don’t go to plan. That could be something like changing a meet-up with a friend, or a willingness to do something outside of your comfort zone.

9. You have unrealistic expectations.

Two young women are standing outdoors, wearing straw hats and backpacks. They are dressed in light, summery clothing, with one adjusting her hat while looking to the side. The background is a scenic view with a bright, sunlit sky and natural surroundings.

Frustration and disappointment are the bedfellows of unrealistic standards, whether they are for yourself or others. Sometimes, the best you can hope for is for someone to do the best that they can. The outcome may not be what you envisioned, it may not even be what you want, but sometimes it’s what you have to accept. The better you know people and the more flexible you are, the easier it is to set expectations.

10. You shift blame onto others.

A woman sitting on a couch is pointing her finger while speaking to a man who sits next to her with his arms crossed, looking away. They are in a bright living room with a staircase, decorative items, and a plant in the background.

It’s exhausting to listen to someone talk about how their issues are the fault of everyone else. Furthermore, it makes you look absolutely ridiculous. Everyone makes mistakes. Everyone does dumb things from time to time. No one is immune to this because it’s just part of being human. Only unreasonable people who you probably shouldn’t be listening to in the first place would expect otherwise. You have to be able to own your mistakes.

Let’s be real.

Two women are standing outside in conversation. The woman on the right, wearing a black and white striped top, has her eyes closed and hand raised as if making a point. The woman on the left, with dark hair, is facing away from the camera.

People can be quite forgiving when it comes to certain quirks of others. A little communication goes a long way. The major issues arise when those quirks turn into consistent problems that start to negatively affect others regularly.

If you always avoid blame, then you can’t be trusted to not point the finger at someone else. If you’re always negative or argumentative, you’re going to make other people feel bad.

Emotionally healthy people with good boundaries won’t put up with these behaviors for long because it will impact their peace of mind and happiness. These are behaviors that need to be worked on, for your own happiness and the health of your relationships.