10 Behaviors That Make You A Pushover In Relationships

Do you always give in?

A woman with blonde hair sits on a couch, looking thoughtful and slightly distressed, with her hand resting on her chin. In the background, a man with a beard sits with his arms crossed, gazing towards her with a serious expression. The setting appears to be a living room.

Relationships are about give and take. From both parties.

If you lack confidence or self-respect, or you were simply raised to believe you should be selfless in relationships, it’s likely you’re giving a lot more than you’re receiving. You may not even realize you’re doing it.

If you engage in these 10 behaviors, there’s a good chance you’re a pushover. And there’s also a good chance your partner will consciously or unconsciously use that to their advantage.

1. You apologize a lot, often for things that aren’t your fault.

A woman sits on a couch with her hand on her forehead, appearing upset. A man next to her clasps his hands together, as if pleading or apologizing. Both individuals are casually dressed, and the room appears bright with large windows in the background.

When something goes wrong, you are the first one to assume the blame for it. You find yourself saying sorry to your partner a lot, even when you know that it wasn’t really your fault.

2. You lack trust in your relationship and your partner.

A couple sits on a couch at home, facing each other and smiling. A tablet, a notebook, and headphones are on the coffee table in the foreground. They appear relaxed, engaging in a pleasant conversation.

In the back of your mind is the nagging feeling that, at any minute, your partner will leave you or do something that breaks your trust. They may have done nothing to earn this doubt, but it affects how you are around them and how you feel about the relationship.

Because of this lack of confidence you bend over backwards to make them happy, including agreeing to things you don’t really want to do.

3. You try too hard to be what you think they want you to be.

A young couple stands together under a bridge, smiling at the camera. The woman, with shoulder-length blonde hair, wears a gray top and jeans, while the man, with short brown hair, wears a gray shirt and a maroon jacket. The background features an urban setting.

You think that if you turn yourself into their ideal man or woman, your partner will love you more and your relationship will be happier for it. So you change things about your appearance or the way you behave to live up to this dream figure you think your partner wants you to be.

4. You analyze everything they say.

A couple sits closely together on a leather couch at home, both wearing cozy sweaters. The man has a serious expression and gently touches the woman's arm, while she looks down pensively. A laptop is open on the table in front of them, and the room is warmly lit.

You believe you can discover your partner’s true thoughts and feelings about you from what they say. So you analyze every little comment that leaves their mouth to look for clues.

If you think you spot some negative hidden meaning, this further fuels your need to get back in their good books by any means possible.

5. You bite your tongue rather than risk an argument.

A man stands close to a woman, gently holding her shoulders, looking concerned. The woman faces away, pressing her hands to her temples, appearing distressed or deep in thought. They are indoors, next to a large window with soft daylight filtering in.

You worry about the state of your relationship and you doubt your ability to hold your own in an argument with your partner, meaning you refuse to express how you truly feel. You think that as long as you keep the peace, your relationship will be okay.

6. You take on more of the shared work.

A woman multitasks, talking on the phone and working on a laptop, while a young girl beside her applies peanut butter to a slice of bread. The scene is set in a kitchen with jars of jam, a green apple, and other kitchen items on the counter.

Whatever things need doing, you do more of them. Your partner may not have asked you to, but you want to please them and show how good a partner you are. So you do more household chores and more of the organization when it comes to things like dates (though of course, they are allowed to make the final decisions).

7. You only ever state your wishes with a caveat.

An older couple sits on a couch in a brightly lit room with large windows. They are holding hands and gazing at each other, smiling warmly. There are potted plants on the windowsill behind them.

If you manage to build up the nerve to say what you’d like in some situation or another, you always tag on a caveat at the end. It’s much like, “I think it’d be nice to go for a walk down by the lake this afternoon, unless you don’t want to, of course.”

8. You’re oversensitive to your partner’s words and actions.

A man and a woman sit on a couch indoors, both appearing upset. The man, looking at his phone, has a neutral expression, while the woman looks down with her arms crossed, seeming distressed. The background includes a white brick wall and a coffee table in front of them.

If your partner makes even the slightest critical statement, it cuts you to the bone. If they prioritize meeting up with their friends over you – even if it’s only once and they haven’t seen these friends in ages – you take it as a slight and a message that your relationship isn’t enough for them.

9. You are clingy.

A couple stands in a modern kitchen, sharing a kiss while holding bowls of food. The woman, in a yellow shirt and jeans, stands next to a man in a plaid shirt and jeans who is leaning against the counter. A refrigerator and kitchen items are visible in the background.

To make up for your lack of confidence in yourself and your relationship, you tend to stick close by your partner as much as possible. You hover around so you can preempt their needs and be of service when needed. You tell yourself that if you know what they’re up to, you’ll feel less insecure about your relationship.

10. You seek regular reassurance of your partner’s love.

A man and woman stand close to each other near a window. The man, with short dark hair and a beard, gently embraces the woman from behind. The woman, with her eyes closed, leans back into him, appearing content. They both wear light-colored clothing.

You’re never quite sure how your partner feels about you (probably because you’re not actually being authentic with them), and so you regularly ask them to confirm their love for you. And when they do, you breathe a sigh of relief… for about 5 minutes until they do something that makes you question their feelings.