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If you don’t do these 17 things, you’re not as mature as you think

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1. Being quick to admit when you are wrong.

A young man with wavy hair wearing a pink t-shirt stands outdoors in front of tropical plants. He is looking at the camera with a neutral expression and giving a thumbs-down gesture with his right hand.

One of the most telling signs of maturity is the ability to acknowledge mistakes without hesitation. It’s not about being overly self-critical or constantly doubting oneself. Rather, emotional maturity manifests in the self-awareness and confidence to recognize errors and the courage to admit them openly.

Those who’ve reached this level of growth understand that being wrong doesn’t diminish their worth or intelligence. Instead, they view mistakes as opportunities for learning and personal development. They don’t waste energy defending an incorrect position or making excuses.

2. Handling constructive criticism with grace and dignity.

A woman holding a coffee mug stands beside a man who is seated and working on a laptop. They are both smiling and appear to be in a modern, bright office with large windows in the background. The atmosphere is collaborative and friendly.

In my early twenties, I received feedback on a project I’d poured my heart into. Instead of listening objectively, I became defensive, arguing against every point. It wasn’t until a colleague gently pointed out my reaction that I realized how immature my response had been.

You see, accepting criticism constructively is a feature of personal growth. It involves listening attentively, considering the feedback without immediate judgment, and responding thoughtfully rather than reactively.

Emotionally intelligent individuals understand that criticism, when offered constructively, is not a personal attack but an opportunity for improvement. They can separate their ego from the situation, focusing on the potential benefits of the feedback rather than feeling threatened by it.

3. Tackling difficult issues head on.

A woman with short curly brown hair leans her head against a textured wall, looking off to the side with a thoughtful expression. She is wearing a simple olive green top, and the background consists of neutral gray and white tones.

Maturity often reveals itself in how we approach challenges, facing uncomfortable situations or difficult conversations directly. Mature people recognize that to put off addressing these issues often leads to bigger problems down the line.

This doesn’t mean rushing into confrontations recklessly. Instead, a thoughtful approach to difficult topics involves preparation and consideration. A mature person considers the best time and place for such discussions, thinks about the other person’s perspective, and focuses on finding solutions rather than assigning blame.

4. Considering how your actions might affect others.

A woman with long, wavy brown hair featuring blonde highlights is wearing a light green sweater and standing against a light blue background. She has a serious expression and is looking directly at the camera.

A key aspect of maturity is the ability to look beyond immediate wants and needs to consider the impact of actions on others. It’s not about sacrificing personal needs, but about developing a broader perspective that takes into account the interconnected nature of our lives.

Those who exhibit emotional maturity pause before acting or speaking to consider the potential consequences. They ask themselves questions like, “How might this decision affect my colleagues?” or “What could be the long-term impact of this action on my relationships?”

5. Planning for your future.

A woman with dark hair tied back stands in front of a softly lit background, looking slightly upwards and to the side. She is wearing a white shirt and has a thoughtful expression on her face. The lighting creates a warm, gentle glow around her.

While living in the moment has its merits, those with wisdom understand the importance of preparing for the future. This involves setting realistic goals, both short-term and long-term, and taking consistent steps toward achieving them. That might mean saving for retirement, investing in personal development, or making career decisions with a view to future growth.

It’s important to note that planning for the future doesn’t mean obsessing over every detail or being inflexible. Instead, it’s about having a general direction and making choices that align with a long-term vision. Mature people also understand that plans may need to be adjusted as circumstances change. They remain adaptable while still keeping their eye on the bigger picture.

6. Being emotionally stable.

A woman with curly hair wearing a red top is screaming while clenching her fists and showing an angry facial expression against a black background.

Emotional stability doesn’t mean never experiencing strong emotions—it means having the ability to manage and express them appropriately. A mature person won’t let their feelings dictate their actions. They can experience anger, sadness, or frustration without lashing out or making impulsive decisions. Such people have developed coping mechanisms to deal with stress and anxiety, maintaining a sense of perspective even in challenging situations.

Emotional stability also involves recognizing and accepting one’s emotions without being overwhelmed by them. The ability to discuss feelings openly and honestly, without resorting to emotional manipulation or dramatic outbursts shows a great deal of maturity.

7. Knowing how and when to give and take.

A man and a woman sit at a table in a cafe, holding coffee cups and engaged in conversation. They face each other, with the woman on the left wearing a light-colored top and the man on the right wearing a red shirt. The setting appears cozy and relaxed.

Understanding the delicate balance of give and take goes beyond simple reciprocity; it’s about recognizing the ebb and flow of relationships and situations. Mature individuals know when to assert themselves and when to compromise. They can advocate for their needs without trampling on others, and they’re willing to make concessions when appropriate.

This balance extends to various aspects of life—in relationships, work collaborations, and even in self-care. They know that that personal needs should sometimes take priority, while other times, the needs of others or the greater good should take precedence.

8. Making decisions thoughtfully.

A woman with long, wavy blonde hair wearing a dark hooded cloak stands in a forest. Her hair is windswept, and the background shows blurry trees with a hint of light filtering through. Her expression is calm and focused.

Decision-making is a critical area where maturity often shines through. Mature individuals approach decisions with a blend of careful consideration and decisive action. And this doesn’t mean rushing into choices based purely on emotion or impulse, nor becoming paralyzed by overthinking. It means gathering relevant information, considering potential outcomes, and weighing up the pros and cons. They’re not afraid to seek advice when needed, but they also trust their own judgment.

A true sign of mental maturity is also the ability to commit to a decision once it’s made, taking responsibility for the outcomes rather than second-guessing constantly.

9. Rigorously defending your work-life balance.

Two men having a conversation in an office. One is seated, wearing glasses, a blue blazer, and holding a smartphone. The other is standing, wearing a white turtleneck and resting his arm on the back of the chair, looking at the seated man.

In today’s fast-paced world, maintaining a healthy work-life balance is both challenging and crucial. Mature people recognize the importance of this balance and actively work to protect it. They understand that their value isn’t solely determined by professional achievements and that personal time is essential for well-being and productivity.

They strive for efficiency and effectiveness during work hours to create space for personal life. These individuals also set clear boundaries, learning to say no to excessive demands on their time and energy.

10. Being able to forgive yourself and others.

Two women are sitting and facing each other. One woman, with shoulder-length blonde hair, is seen from behind, while the other woman, with curly dark hair, is facing the viewer and holding the other woman's hands, appearing to engage in a supportive conversation.

The ability to forgive is a profound indicator of emotional maturity. This includes forgiving others for their mistakes and shortcomings, as well as extending that same grace to oneself. These people understand that holding onto grudges or dwelling on past mistakes is ultimately self-destructive. They can acknowledge hurt or disappointment without letting it define their relationships or self-perception.

Forgiving doesn’t mean forgetting or condoning harmful behavior; rather, it’s about processing negative emotions and choosing to move forward. When it comes to self-forgiveness, mature people can acknowledge their mistakes, learn from them, and then let go of excessive guilt or self-recrimination.

11. Reflecting upon your behavior and life.

A young woman with short, wavy brown hair and a maroon collared shirt gazes downward with a thoughtful expression. The background is softly blurred, featuring warm colors and indistinct objects, suggesting an indoor setting.

Mature individuals regularly take time to examine their actions, thoughts, and patterns. A key distinction is that this isn’t about harsh self-criticism, but rather an honest and compassionate evaluation of one’s life.

They ask themselves questions like, “Why did I react that way?” or “Is this decision aligned with my values?” This habit of introspection allows for learning from experiences, identifying areas for improvement, and celebrating personal growth.

12. Not placing much weight on how others view you.

A woman with shoulder-length dark hair stands by a tall window, gazing thoughtfully into the distance. She is wearing a sleeveless, red halter-neck dress. The background is minimalist with light-grey textured walls.

A subtle yet significant sign of maturity is the ability to live authentically without being overly concerned about others’ opinions. It’s not about completely disregarding feedback or social norms, but rather having a strong sense of self that isn’t easily swayed by external judgments.

These folks understand that it’s impossible to please everyone and that trying to do so often leads to personal dissatisfaction. They make choices based on their own values and beliefs rather than seeking constant approval from others.

This independence of thought allows for more authentic living and decision-making that truly aligns with personal goals and values, reflecting a deep sense of self-confidence and inner security.

13. Respecting others’ boundaries and upholding your own.

An older man with white hair and glasses is engaged in a serious conversation with a younger man with a beard. They are sitting on a gray couch in a well-lit room, facing each other, with the older man gesturing with his hands.

Understanding and respecting boundaries—both your own and those of others—is a crucial aspect of maturity. These individuals recognize that healthy relationships of all kinds require clear boundaries, and they’re able to communicate their own limits effectively without aggression or apology. Equally, they respect the boundaries set by others, even when they might not fully understand or agree with them.

14. Appreciating different perspectives from your own.

A woman with long curly hair and wearing a dark blue shirt gestures with her hands while speaking to another woman with straight hair, who is blurred in the foreground. They appear to be having a serious conversation in a bright, indoor setting.

Mature individuals don’t see disagreements as threats to their own beliefs or identity. Instead, they approach diverse perspectives with curiosity and openness. They listen actively to understand, not just to respond or refute. They don’t easily abandon their beliefs, but they are willing to consider that their view might not be the only valid one.

These people can engage in respectful debates without resorting to personal attacks or becoming overly defensive. This openness to different perspectives enriches understanding of the world and helps in making more informed decisions. Consequently, it fosters better relationships and communication, as others feel heard and respected even in disagreement.

15. Allowing yourself to ask for help when you need it.

Two women are looking at a computer screen and smiling. One is wearing glasses and a white top, while the other is standing and holding a file, dressed in a blue top. They appear to be in an office space with colorful posters on the walls.

Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness but of self-awareness and strength. Those who exhibit emotional maturity understand that no one can excel at everything or handle every situation alone. They’re able to assess their own limitations honestly and reach out for support when necessary.

This might mean seeking professional advice, asking a friend for emotional support, or delegating tasks at work. Asking for help demonstrates humility, teamwork skills, and a commitment to personal and professional growth. And it often leads to better, healthier outcomes.

16. Controlling your impulses.

A woman stands in a shopping mall holding several colorful shopping bags. She appears thoughtful with one hand resting on her chin. She is wearing a sleeveless dress with a dark blue floral pattern on a light background. The background shows blurred mall stores.

Impulse control is the ability to resist immediate gratification in favor of long-term benefits or to avoid negative consequences. Mature people can pause before reacting, considering the potential outcomes of their actions. It’s not about never acting spontaneously or enjoying life’s pleasures, but having the self-discipline to make conscious choices rather than being ruled by momentary urges.

Whether it’s resisting the temptation to make an unnecessary purchase, avoiding an angry outburst, or sticking to a healthy diet, impulse control plays a crucial role in many aspects of life. This skill demonstrates self-awareness, emotional regulation, and the ability to prioritize long-term goals over short-term desires.

17. Following through on commitments.

Two people sit at an outdoor cafe. The person on the left, wearing a light blue beanie and brown coat, eats from an orange mug, looking at the camera. The person on the right, in a black beanie and wrapped in a green blanket, looks down at the table.

Nothing demonstrates reliability and consistency more clearly than following through on commitments. Mature individuals understand the importance of their word and the impact that breaking promises can have on their relationships and reputation.

They carefully consider before making commitments, ensuring they can realistically fulfill them. When they say they’ll do something, they do it, barring unforeseen circumstances. If they can’t meet a commitment, they communicate proactively and take responsibility for the situation. This reliability extends to both personal and professional spheres—from showing up on time for a friend’s birthday to meeting work deadlines.

About The Author

Steve Phillips-Waller is the founder and editor of A Conscious Rethink. He has written extensively on the topics of life, relationships, and mental health for more than 8 years.