11 types of people you need to leave behind (so you can move forward)

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Let these people go if you want to progress in life.

A person with long, wavy blonde hair looks to the side while standing on a city street. They wear a white top with a blue-gray jacket. The background features blurred buildings and cars on a busy road.

Life’s journey is filled with relationships that shape our path. But not all connections propel us forward. Some act as anchors, holding us back from reaching our true potential. Recognizing and distancing ourselves from these influences is crucial for personal growth and happiness. Let’s explore the types of people you might need to leave behind to pave the way for a brighter future.

1. People who doubt you.

Two women sit at a table in a cozy setting, engaged in an intense conversation. The woman on the left has red hair, is wearing a gray sweater, and gestures expressively. The woman on the right has dark hair, appears frustrated, and rests her hand on her head. They have coffee drinks in front of them.

Imagine trying to climb a mountain with someone constantly tugging at your backpack, insisting you’ll never reach the summit. That’s what doubters do to your dreams. These pessimists masquerade as realists, constantly questioning your abilities and decisions. Their skepticism chips away at your confidence, making you second-guess your every move.

Over time, their doubt can seep into your own mindset, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy of failure. But your potential is not limited by their lack of vision. Surround yourself with those who believe in you, even when you struggle to believe in yourself.

2. People who talk you down.

Two women are having an intense conversation in a brightly lit room. The woman on the left, with curly hair and wearing a yellow crop top, has a concerned expression. The woman on the right, with straight hair and wearing a white shirt under a green overall dress, gestures emphatically.

Words have power, and some people wield that power like a weapon. These individuals seem to have a knack for finding your weak spots and exploiting them with cutting remarks or backhanded compliments. They might disguise their barbs as jokes or friendly advice, but the impact is far from amusing.

Constant exposure to such negativity can erode your self-esteem and distort your self-image. It’s essential to recognize that their words often stem from their own insecurities or jealousies. Don’t let their issues become your burden. Seek out those who lift you up with genuine encouragement and constructive feedback.

3. People who resent your success.

Two women are sitting on a bench in a park. One woman with light hair gestures as she speaks, while the other woman with dark hair listens with a serious expression. Trees and a building are visible in the background under sunny weather.

Success should be celebrated, not resented. Yet some individuals can’t help but feel bitter when you achieve your goals. They might downplay your accomplishments, attribute your success to luck, or even try to sabotage your future endeavors. This toxic behavior often stems from their own feelings of inadequacy or fear of being left behind.

Their resentment can cast a shadow over your victories, making it difficult to fully enjoy your hard-earned achievements. Remember, true friends rejoice in your success as if it were their own. Surround yourself with people who genuinely cheer you on and inspire you to reach even greater heights.

4. People who are overly negative.

Two women are sitting together on a wooden bench. One woman with long, gray hair is talking to the other woman, who has long, black hair and is looking up with a thoughtful expression. Both are wearing beige coats. The background is slightly blurred but suggests an outdoor setting.

Negativity is contagious, and some people seem to be walking petri dishes of pessimism. These eternal doom-and-gloomers find the dark cloud in every silver lining, turning even the most positive situations into potential disasters. While it’s important to be realistic, constant negativity can drain your energy and dampen your enthusiasm for life.

It can also skew your perspective, making you more likely to focus on problems rather than solutions. Prolonged exposure to such negativity can impact your mental health and overall well-being. Seek out individuals who maintain a balanced outlook and can appreciate life’s joys, big and small.

5. People who use you.

Two women sit on a gray couch having a conversation in a bright living room. The woman on the left, with braided hair and wearing a pink sweater, looks contemplative. The woman on the right, with curly hair and wearing a brown sweater, gestures expressively.

Some relationships are less about mutual growth and more about one-sided exploitation. These users view you as a resource to be tapped rather than a person to be valued. They might constantly ask for favors, borrow money without repaying, or only reach out when they need something. Their charm often masks their true intentions, making it easy to fall into their trap of manipulation.

Over time, this imbalance can leave you feeling drained and underappreciated. A healthy relationship involves give and take, with both parties contributing and benefiting. Don’t let anyone treat you like a convenience store—open 24/7 for their needs but never restocked.

6. People who drain your time and energy.

Black and white photo of two individuals leaning against a textured wall. The person in the foreground, wearing a beanie and scarf, looks directly at the camera with a neutral expression. The person in the background is slightly out of focus. Both are dressed in dark clothing.

Energy vampires are real, and they come in human form. These individuals seem to have an uncanny ability to suck the life out of every interaction. They might monopolize conversations with their problems, demand constant attention, or create drama that pulls you into their chaotic world.

After spending time with them, you often feel exhausted, both mentally and emotionally. While it’s important to be supportive of friends, it’s equally crucial to maintain healthy boundaries. Your time and energy are precious resources—invest them wisely in relationships that energize and inspire you, rather than those that leave you feeling depleted.

7. People who compete with you in every single thing.

Two men dressed in business suits and ties are crouched at the starting line on a running track, poised to race. The scene blends professional attire with athletic competition as they prepare for a sprint. The background features empty stadium bleachers.

Life isn’t a never-ending Olympics, but some people didn’t get the memo. These ultra-competitive individuals turn every interaction into a contest, whether it’s about career achievements, personal relationships, or even the most trivial matters. Their constant need to one-up you can turn friendly conversations into exhausting battles of ego.

This relentless competition creates an atmosphere of tension and rivalry, making it difficult to genuinely celebrate each other’s successes or support one another during tough times. True friendship should be a collaboration, not a competition. Seek out relationships where you can grow together, rather than trying to outgrow each other.

8. People who try to change you.

A man and a woman stand close to each other against a gray background. The woman, wearing a blue top, has her hand on the man's chest and is looking at him with a serious expression. The man, in a denim shirt, faces her with a slightly amused look.

Your uniqueness is your superpower, but some people seem determined to mold you into their ideal version. These self-appointed life coaches constantly offer unsolicited advice on how you should dress, act, or live your life. While their intentions might seem good, their actions undermine your autonomy and self-expression. This persistent pressure to conform can chip away at your self-confidence and authentic self.

It’s important to be open to growth and constructive feedback, but not at the cost of losing your essence. Surround yourself with people who appreciate you for who you are, quirks and all, and who encourage you to become the best version of yourself—not someone else entirely.

9. People who don’t support your goals or ambitions.

Close-up of two women, one in sharp focus and the other blurred in the foreground. The woman in focus has a serious expression and is wearing a gray top, while the blurred woman in the foreground wears a black top. The lighting creates shadows on their faces.

Dreams need nurturing to grow, but some people act more like dream-crushers than cheerleaders. These individuals might dismiss your aspirations as unrealistic, try to redirect you towards more “practical” paths, or simply show a lack of interest in your pursuits. Their lack of support can be disheartening, especially when you’re facing challenges or doubts.

While not everyone needs to share your exact vision, the people closest to you should at least respect and encourage your ambitions. Surrounding yourself with supportive individuals who believe in your potential can provide the motivation and confidence you need to pursue your goals, even in the face of obstacles.

10. People who make you feel guilty for prioritizing yourself.

A senior woman with gray curly hair passionately talks to a young blonde woman sitting next to her on a couch. The young woman looks down, appearing upset or deep in thought. The room has subtle decor with a potted plant and a white vase in the background.

Self-care isn’t selfish, but some people seem to think otherwise. These guilt-trippers make you feel bad for setting boundaries, taking time for yourself, or pursuing your own interests. They might use emotional manipulation, passive-aggressive comments, or outright accusations to make you feel obligated to prioritize their needs over your own. This constant guilt can lead to burnout and resentment, as you neglect your own well-being to keep others happy.

Remember, taking care of yourself isn’t just important—it’s necessary. You can’t pour from an empty cup, and prioritizing your own needs allows you to show up more fully for others in the long run.

11. People who bring out the worst in you.

Two women sit at an outdoor café, engaged in a conversation. The woman in a red jacket gestures emotionally with her hands, appearing frustrated or upset. Two white cups are on the table in front of them, and the background shows an overcast sky and trees.

We all have our flaws, but some people seem to have a knack for amplifying them. These negative influences might encourage your bad habits, trigger your insecurities, or bring out qualities you’re not proud of. Perhaps you find yourself gossiping more in their company, engaging in risky behaviors, or becoming more cynical.

Their presence acts like a magnet, pulling you away from your best self and toward versions of you that you’ve worked hard to overcome. It’s crucial to recognize these toxic dynamics and distance yourself from those who consistently bring out your worst traits. Instead, seek out relationships that inspire you to grow, challenge you positively, and help you become the person you aspire to be.

About The Author

Steve Phillips-Waller is the founder and editor of A Conscious Rethink. He has written extensively on the topics of life, relationships, and mental health for more than 8 years.