11 Red Flags That Signal Your Relationship Is Moving Way Too Fast

Don’t Miss These 11 Red Flags

A couple stands in a cozy room, with the man gently hugging the woman from behind and kissing her head. She smiles softly while looking to the side. Shelving with decorative items and a plant are visible in the background.

When a new relationship begins to blossom, it can be difficult to keep your feet on the ground. The hormones start firing, and you can easily get swept up in the romance of it all and move too quickly.

Then, at some point down the line, you suddenly realize that you’re in way over your head.

Of course, every person and every relationship are different, so there’s no one-size-fits-all way of judging things, but if you recognize many of these signs, there’s a good chance your relationship is moving too quickly for you.

1. You talk too much about the future.

A smiling couple holding hands across a café table, gazing into each other's eyes. The man, wearing a hat and glasses, sits opposite the woman with sunglasses on her head. A small potted plant is on the table outside a cozy establishment with colorful flowers in the background.

If you and your new catch spend ages talking about how your future together is going to look, you’re getting ahead of yourselves.

Yes, you do need to have those serious conversations at some point, but if you’re discussing where you’re going to live, how many kids you want, and what your wedding is going to look like after only knowing them for a month or two, are you living in the real world or a fantasy?

2. There’s a lot that you don’t know about each other.

A couple sits close together on a couch, gazing into each other's eyes with gentle smiles. The woman has dark hair tied back and wears a yellow sweater. The man with a beard and glasses wears a red sweater, and his arm rests around the woman's shoulders.

I hate to break it to you, but love at first sight just doesn’t exist.

If things seem to be getting pretty serious, but you can’t really claim to know the person you’re getting involved with, or you just haven’t known them that long, you’re probably right in thinking that things need to be taken down a notch.

A relationship needs to be given time and space to develop naturally.

You need to really get to know each other to be able to figure out whether you might be a match made in heaven, without any pressure being put on things. That can only come with time.

3. Your friends have commented on how quickly feelings seemed to have developed.

Two men sit on a leather couch engaged in conversation, each holding a mug. One wears a maroon shirt and holds a mug with a flag design, while the other wears a light blue shirt with a plain mug, gesturing with his free hand.

Whilst no one can get inside your head and understand what you may be feeling, when someone who cares for you expresses their concern that things are moving too quickly, you should listen to them.

From within the relationship, everything might appear to be going great, but you might not be able to see the red flags from where you are. It sometimes takes an outside perspective to identify if and when something doesn’t quite seem right. After all, your friends don’t want to see you get hurt.

That’s not to say that this relationship is not going to work out, just that it could do with having the brakes applied to it slightly.

4. You’re hitting relationship milestones at a rapid rate.

A group of six people enjoys a backyard gathering. In the foreground, an older couple is seated and holding coffee mugs. In the background, four younger individuals are standing and smiling, with greenery surrounding them. The scene is relaxed and cheerful.

You’re barely a couple of months into the relationship and yet you’ve met each other’s friends, family, colleagues, pet dogs… pretty much everyone.

You’ve been on your first vacation as a couple, you’ve said “I love you” to each other, you’re seriously considering moving in together, and you’ve exchanged some sort of eternity ring or other extra special gifts.

These things can take many couples several months. Others may take a year or more. If you’ve ticked them all off already, your relationship is certainly going at a rapid pace.

5. You trust them completely before even having your first fight.

A couple seated at an outdoor café table with the woman holding a coffee cup and smiling at the man. The table has a bouquet of flowers and a saucer. They both appear to be enjoying a pleasant conversation amidst a lush, green background.

Trust takes time to build. You can’t simply flick a switch in your head and trust someone. And trust is much more than believing they will be faithful to you. Trust covers everything from expressing honesty in how you feel, to knowing that a person will try their best at every opportunity to take your feelings into account.

Trust is also about being reliable and being there when someone needs you. But if you have only known this person for a little while, there’s no way to tell for sure that they can be relied upon to support you when you go through a difficult time.

They may run for the hills at the first sign of trouble, both in your life and in your relationship. Have you had your first fight? If not, you don’t know how they will react and whether their commitment will waiver.

6. You can’t make decisions without consulting them.

A young man with brown hair, wearing a blue and green checkered shirt, sits against a tufted white background. He holds a smartphone to his lips, looking thoughtful and concerned.

Has your relationship already reached a point where you can’t make decisions about your own life without consulting them first?

Whilst established couples may be each other’s sounding boards for big decisions, if you’re in the early days of the relationship, you should still be making the decisions that are best for you and not worrying too much about the other person.

7. You’ve reached the same “couple level” as your recent past relationship.

A couple lies on a bed in a cozy setting, with the woman smiling and nestling against the man. The man has his arm around her and is looking at her affectionately. Both appear relaxed and content, surrounded by warm, earthy tones of the bedding and room.

If you entered into this new relationship not long after the end of your last relationship, it can be tempting to treat it and your new partner in the same way you did your past relationship and ex.

This is a classic sign of a rebound relationship. You want that same level of connection and commitment and couply behavior and so you force things before they are ready. You think in terms of “us” because you’ve been in that mindset with a recent ex and it had become a part of your identity that you lost and now want back.

8. You spend ALL your free time together.

A couple stands closely on an outdoor balcony, their foreheads touching. The woman, wearing a red jacket, gently holds the collar of the man's denim jacket. Both have their eyes closed in a tender moment. City buildings and a handrail are visible in the background.

Infatuation with a new love interest can be intoxicating. Like a drug, you want to see them as much as you can.

And while it’s common to see someone you’re newly involved with 2-3 times a week, you seem to have upped the intensity to almost daily already.

Your lives seem almost merged because you’re rarely apart for more than a day or so. You might meet during your lunch breaks, then have dinner after work, and one of you spends the night at the other’s place more often than not. And don’t get me started on your loved-up weekends.

9. You are in constant virtual contact.

A woman in a plaid shirt sits at a cafe table by a window, smiling as she looks at her smartphone. On the table are a teal teapot, a glass of water, and a white cup. Sunlight filters through the window, creating a warm ambiance.

Even when you’re not physically together, you maintain a constant mental and emotional connection thanks to the world of instant virtual communication.

Text messages fly from phone to phone with such speed that you can barely put yours down before it beeps at you again.

Not only that, but you’re all over each other’s Instagram and other socials, liking, commenting, watching, and so on.

10. Your relationship is like a romance movie – on fast forward!

A couple stands close together on a rocky beach with clear blue skies and water in the background. The man, in glasses and a gray sweater, hugs the woman from behind. The woman, with curly hair, smiles contently, both looking towards the horizon.

You know those romantic movies where two people meet and seem to fall in love 3 scenes later? That’s your relationship.

Only, while a movie can condense days, weeks, and months into the space of 90 minutes, your relationship really is moving at a crazy speed.

You may think it’s all down to chemistry and passion, but it might also be that neither of you has a firm grasp on the reality of the situation so are just getting swept along by all the emotions.

11. They are your +1 for big events.

A man in a suit and tie smiles as a woman feeds him a spoonful of dessert. They are seated at a table in what appears to be a restaurant with a view of the city. A bouquet of red roses and a glass of red wine are on the table.

Did you invite them to your friend’s wedding? Are they on the guest list for your nephew’s baptism?

How long have you known them? And do they really deserve to be coming to those major life events if you haven’t been in a fully committed and exclusive relationship for a few months at the very least? Probably not.

After all, if you can’t be fairly sure that they will still be around in the near future (let alone the long-term future), do you want them to be in the family or friend photo albums for decades to come?