12 Excuses People Make That Keep Them Chained To A Life Of Disappointment

If you’re making any of these excuses, now is the time to stop.

A person wearing a gray sweater and knitted hat sits pensively at a wooden table in a wooded area, resting their hands on their cheeks and gazing downward. The background is softly blurred with autumn leaves on the ground.

Countless elderly people talk about all the things they regret, and the actions they should have taken to avoid the life of disappointment and sadness they find themselves in. Most people who don’t make changes to improve their lives rattle off the excuses that follow, and they live to regret their decisions.

1. “I’ve invested so much into this, it would be stupid to change now.”

A man and a woman sit on a couch with their arms crossed, facing forward. Both are wearing light blue shirts and jeans. The background appears to be a softly lit living room, but their facial expressions are not visible as the image is cropped at their shoulders.

This is what’s known as a “sunk cost” fallacy: the belief that if one has put X amount of time and effort into something, that investment would be lost by not continuing on that path. Even if they’re completely miserable in their career or relationship, a person feels obligated to carry on.

2. “This is just how I am.”

A woman with long blonde hair and a dark shirt sits on a bed, shrugging with a playful, puzzled expression. She faces another person with short dark hair who is slightly out of focus. In the background, there are shelves, a clock, and a window letting in light.

A person who’s miserable with their physical or mental health may convince themselves that it’s just how they are, and keep wallowing in despair. They’ll use this excuse when they don’t want to face the reality of their circumstances, so they insist that since they can’t change, there’s no point in trying.

3. “It’s not going to work anyway.”

A man in a suit holds his hands to his head with a stressed expression. He has short hair and a beard, and is standing indoors with a blurred background that appears to contain shelves or cabinets.

Far too many people allow past defeats to dictate future actions. They might have tried something and failed at it, and are so intent on never feeling the discomfort of defeat again that they never take another chance. The one way to ensure disappointment is to never take any risks at all.

4. “I’ll start tomorrow—it isn’t the right time today.”

A woman with long dark hair and a thoughtful expression rests her chin on her hand while gazing into the distance. She is wearing a light pink top and appears to be in a well-lit indoor setting.

There’s never a “right time” for anything, but procrastinating on making real change happen is just going to keep delaying it. If you’re disappointed in a particular aspect of your life, the best time to start changing it was yesterday, and the second-best time to start is right now.

5. “I’m too old to change now.”

A woman with light-colored hair styled loosely and wearing a blue shirt gazes ahead with a serious expression. The background is a solid, muted brown color.

This is a common excuse given by those who are sad and unhappy in their marriage or career, especially if they’re over the age of 40. Many feel that they don’t have enough time or energy left to pursue their dreams, so they should simply make the best of their misery.

6. “I don’t have the credentials, nor the means to get them.”

A man with glasses and a beard is standing by a window, looking outside. He is wearing a gray sweater over a collared shirt. Natural light is illuminating his face, creating a thoughtful expression. The background shows a blurred view of trees and outdoor scenery.

Many people believe that unless they have a certain set of “qualifications”, then they’re ineligible for a lot of the pursuits that they would find fulfilling. This isn’t actually the case. For example, you can work on archaeology sites without a degree, as long as you have basic field school training.

7. “I can’t turn others’ lives upside-down for my own selfishness.”

A woman with long brown hair is resting her head on her folded arms, looking contemplative or sad. She is wearing a brown sweater, and her expression suggests deep thought or concern. The background is blurred, focusing attention on her face.

Many people remain chained to a life of disappointment because they’re convinced that they’ll disappoint others (or even ruin their lives) if they make big changes that benefit themselves. They don’t want to risk upsetting kids by getting divorced, or throwing a partner’s life into disarray by going back to school, and so on.

8. “I made my choices, now I have to live with them.”

A black and white photo shows a man with tousled hair and a beard, embracing a woman from behind. The man's expression appears contemplative, while the woman, facing away, rests her head on his shoulder. The background is a blurred, serene outdoor setting.

In some cases, people choose the “hair shirt” punishment route and believe that they deserve the misery of their disappointing circumstances. Their thinking is along the lines of “I made my bed, I’ll lie in it”, and they’ll use self-flagellation as an excuse for not bettering their lives.

9. “I’m not strong or brave enough to make any changes right now.”

A man with short brown hair and light facial hair stands outdoors in front of green foliage. He is wearing a white t-shirt under a patterned denim jacket and gazes directly at the camera with a neutral expression. The sunlight filters through the trees, creating a natural, serene background.

This is an easy excuse to fall back on because it absolves the person of individual responsibility. In their mind, it isn’t that they don’t want to free themselves from their disappointing life: it’s that they don’t have the wherewithal to try. If they could, they would, but oh well—they can’t.

10. “It’s too much of a hassle.”

A woman with blonde hair in a low bun, wearing a white shirt, is looking off to the side with a neutral expression. The background is softly lit and out of focus, creating a calm and serene atmosphere.

Change is messy. It can get overwhelming at times, as well as emotional, and even burdensome—especially if it involves moving to new surroundings without an established supportive circle. For many people, the inevitable stress involved with freeing themselves from disappointment is more daunting than the circumstances crushing their souls.

11. “Nobody around me is supportive.”

A woman with long dark hair and a light gray shirt is looking off to the side with a serious expression. The background is blurred, focusing on her face and expression, which suggests she is deep in thought or concerned.

Some people find themselves in circumstances that aren’t just unsupportive, but may sabotage their endeavors. For instance, trying to get healthy in a family that only eats junk food and never exercises. As such, they may not even bother trying because they feel that they’re being set up to fail.

12. “Things are bound to get better soon, so I’ll wait it out.”

A man with short, light brown hair is gazing to the side. He is wearing a dark jacket and a white collared shirt. His hand is raised near his face, lightly touching his cheek. The background is dark, emphasizing his profile and thoughtful expression.

This is one of the most insidious excuses because the bar can keep being pushed forever. A person who uses this excuse might feel like they haven’t yet reached their breaking point and can tough things out a bit longer, hoping that things will improve instead of getting worse.

People in this case, and in many of the previous points, would do well to remember this quote:

“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” – Anais Nin