People who feel life's not been fair to them display these 12 behaviors

Some people like to rage against the unfairness of life.

A person in a dark sweater stands with eyes looking upwards and arms raised, appearing puzzled or questioning, against a plain gray background.

Most of us get waves of frustration at times when and if we feel that life has dealt us a bad hand, but some people have made life’s unfairness into an identity. Those who fall into the latter category often display the behaviors that follow.

1. They’re always blaming others for everything that happens to them.

A woman with curly hair, wearing a white long-sleeved shirt, points her index finger at someone out of the frame. She has an intense and serious expression on her face. The background appears to be a bright, modern kitchen.

Nothing is ever their own fault: anything that goes wrong in their lives is due to other people’s negligence or mistreatment of them. Even when others point out to them that they’ve had a direct hand in their own misadventures, they still insist that others are to blame.

2. They give up really easily.

A person sitting on a couch wearing headphones and yawning with one hand covering their mouth. A laptop is open in front of them, and a bookshelf with plants and books is visible in the background.

Instead of accepting that mistakes are part of the learning process and that practice makes perfect, they’ll get utterly defeated at the first setback and give up entirely on what they were doing. The same goes for if they face any type of obstacle, or a lack of unconditional support.

3. They constantly complain about whatever is unfair.

A woman stands in front of a yellow background with her arms outstretched and an upset facial expression. She is wearing a long-sleeve gray top and gray pants, conveying a sense of frustration or distress.

You’ve undoubtedly met people who complain incessantly about how unfair a situation is (or was), yet do nothing to improve it. Having crap experiences early in life can have long-lasting repercussions, but if they’re still complaining 30 years later and refusing therapy to make it better, that’s a choice.

4. They put down other people’s joy if they aren’t able to have the same things.

A man in a blue suit and glasses is talking to a woman in a black dress who is holding a coffee cup. They are standing outside a modern building with large windows, and both wear ID badges. The woman crosses her arms and listens attentively.

These are the people who’ll respond to a cake photo with “must be nice”, and launch into a diatribe about how they can’t eat gluten or sugar, and so on. They might even guilt trip people about enjoying things in front of them that they can’t have, since it isn’t fair.

5. They often compare their lives to those who seem to have had it easier (not realizing the truth of things).

A woman with long brown hair is frowning and resting her chin on her hand while looking off to the side. She has a puzzled and slightly annoyed expression on her face. The background is a solid blue color.

We never know the truth of a situation beneath the facade we’re shown. Those who feel that life’s not been fair may complain about someone else’s luck in having a fancy car and traveling abroad, and not realize that they’re fulfilling bucket list items because they have a terminal illness, for example.

6. They behave as the age at which their perceived slight happened.

A man in a suit and sunglasses playfully poses on a motorbike ride at a carousel, surrounded by painted animal figures like a giraffe and a horse. The background displays a fence and trees, suggesting an amusement park setting.

You might notice that many of the people who complain about how unfair life is because of an incident that occurred in their past behave as the age when that perceived unfairness occurred. It’s as though they’ve stagnated there and have consciously refused to mature and evolve past it.

7. They insist that their pain or trauma is worse than anyone else’s.

A woman with long blonde hair sits on a sofa, looking contemplative. She rests her head on one hand, with the other arm wrapped around her knees, wearing a short-sleeve brown top in a softly lit room.

No matter what someone else is dealing with, their issues are worse. Someone’s struggling with a chronic illness? Well, at least they don’t have cancer. A veteran came back from active combat missing a leg? Well, they missed their childhood, and that experience was horribly unfair and traumatic. So there.

8. They have a strange sense of entitlement.

A woman with blonde hair in a purple top is raising her arm and speaking animatedly in a restaurant. She is surrounded by vibrant pink flowers, plants, and glass teapots on the table. The setting has a warm, rustic ambiance.

Many of them seem to believe that they “deserve better”, but according to whose standards? There isn’t a person on the planet who doesn’t struggle at some point, but what makes one of them any more “deserving” of a better, easier, or more stress-free life than anyone else?

9. Competitive avarice.

Two men are facing each other with their foreheads touching and angry expressions on their faces. The man on the left has blonde hair and fair skin, while the man on the right has dark skin and a shaved head. They appear to be in a heated confrontation outdoors.

A person who grew up with parents who favored their siblings over them might be fiercely competitive with others and insist on getting more/better in every situation. These are the types who’ll weigh ice cream scoops to ensure they’re all the same, and then give themselves an extra spoonful.

10. They see everything as a personal attack.

Three men appear to be in a heated discussion in what looks like a modern office setting. One man on the left gestures with open hands, the man in the middle looks concerned, and the man on the right points his finger, seeming defensive. Sunlight streams through large windows.

They tend to be quite defensive and often take any argument or contradiction as an attack. If someone disagrees with them, then they’re being “hateful”, rather than bringing up a valid point. Generally, their viewpoint is a very black and white “you’re either with me or against me” perspective.

11. They focus far more on the past than the present or future.

A woman with light eyes and freckles gazes thoughtfully to the right. Her hand is near her mouth, and she is wearing a black top. The background is a soft beige, creating a calm atmosphere.

Spending time obsessing over perceived injuries in the past robs people of the present moment’s peace and happiness. People who do this can’t seem to appreciate what they have in the here and now: they choose to remain entirely focused on past experiences that they can’t move on from.

12. If they can’t or didn’t have something, then nobody else should.

A young man with short dark hair, wearing a blue plaid shirt, sits at a table with his hands clasped in front of him. He is looking to his right with a thoughtful expression. The background is softly lit with warm lighting and out-of-focus elements.

Many people who feel life’s not been fair are immensely bitter when people get things that they felt they deserved, but never got. They’ll resent people whose student loans were forgiven because theirs weren’t, or hate people who get grants (or medical coverage) that they had to fight for.