16 Mistakes You Need To Stop Making If Your Life Is Off Track

Have you hit rock bottom yet?

Man with short dark hair wearing a suit appears deep in thought, resting his face in his hands. The background is a blurred field and sky, creating a contemplative mood.

Many of us will experience situations in which we seem to hit rock bottom. We often “wake up” from a trance-like state and find ourselves surrounded by the broken remnants of our lives, wondering how we got there and how we’re going to get out.

Putting a stop to the unhelpful behaviors below can help you regroup and start moving forward, regardless of how you got into this mess to begin with.

It’s time to get your life together—are you ready?

1. Avoiding change because it’s uncomfortable.

A woman sits on a couch in a brightly lit room, looking stressed and holding her temples with both hands. She is wearing a gray t-shirt and gray pants. There is a lamp in the background.

Many people find that their lives have veered off course because they’ve avoided things that made them uncomfortable.

For example, a person may stay in an unhealthy relationship that deteriorates over time because they either don’t want to disrupt the family dynamic, or are worried that they couldn’t take care of themselves on their own.

But if you want to make positive changes in your life, you need to accept that it means facing some uncomfortable, even gut-wrenching realities.

But you won’t always face these challenging moments—things will feel easier once you get your life back to where you want it to be.

Acknowledge that change is necessary and recognize that you are more than capable of taking the action required to get back on the right path.

2. Letting your problems get complicated and out of control rather than simplifying them.

A woman with curly hair sits at a kitchen table, looking stressed while working on a laptop. She holds her head with both hands, and papers, a notebook, and a pen are scattered around her. Shelves with jars are visible in the background.

One of the best things you can do is to make a list of the actions that you might take to tackle the issues you’re facing.

For example, if you’ve fallen severely behind in bill payments, determine how that happened and then change the way you’ve been handling this chore up until now.

Many people find it easier to have bill payments automatically deducted from their bank accounts on a specific day of the month. That’s one less thing they have to remember while also juggling things like childcare and work deadlines.

If there are things—big or small—that weigh on your mind or often lead to problems, find ways to simplify them.

Do whatever you can to ease the mental and emotional burden that even the most mundane parts of life can put on you.

3. Believing that you have no control over your situation.

A woman sitting against a metal fence, looking contemplative. She is wearing a brown coat, a scarf, and jeans. Her hand rests on her head, and her expression seems thoughtful and reflective.

If things have gone badly but you still want to sort them out for yourself, you might be feeling helpless and lost.

It may seem as though there are no viable options for digging yourself out of whatever darkness and despair you’re in.

But there are always options available–you just can’t see them right now because your own turmoil is obscuring your view.

In times like this, the best thing you can do is focus on the small things you can control with relative ease.

Here are a couple of things that can help you move forward toward getting your life back on track.

4. Trying to do too many things.

A man in a suit is overwhelmed by a large pile of crumpled papers, reaching out with a distressed expression. His hand is extended toward the camera as he appears to be buried in the disorganized documents.

If you’re focusing on getting your life back on track, you likely have a massive “to-do” list, either in your mind or written down somewhere. That’s great, but it can also be a hindrance.

When there are a million things you need to do to sort out your life, you may freeze up. Some people shut down in the face of such seemingly insurmountable tasks, while others procrastinate and avoid them.

Try not to think about “all the things” you need to do, and simply do ONE of them.

You may not be able to control the circumstances around all the other stuff that needs to get done, but you know what you can do?

Something. Big or small, you can take one action.

That might mean tidying up one space in your home. It might mean sending one important email. It might even mean a little personal grooming if you’ve fallen behind on that.

There are lots of simple ways to make your life better, but you can’t do them all at once. Slow and steady wins the race, so just take one step at a time.

5. Wasting energy on things you can’t control (like the past).

A person with short gray hair and a blue shirt looks out of a window with a thoughtful expression. They hold the white curtain gently, as soft daylight illuminates one side of their face.

Most things are beyond your control. As such, there’s no point in obsessing about them.

For instance, you may feel anger or resentment about how someone treated you a decade ago, but you can’t go back in time and change anything about that situation. Recognize that it’s time to close the book on what happened rather than bringing it back up and chewing on it to your detriment.

Learn to identify what is and is not within your sphere of control. Ask yourself, “Can I influence this situation or outcome through my actions?” If the answer is yes, then take that action. If the answer is no, then adjust your mindset to not waste time and energy fretting about it.

6. Ignoring what past mistakes can teach you.

A man with a beard stands against a wooden wall, wearing a blue shirt. He has his eyes closed and his hand on his forehead, appearing stressed or frustrated.

While it’s natural to want to forget about past failures, it’s important to reflect on them and use them as opportunities for growth and learning.

To begin, take some time to reflect on past mistakes and failures. Ask yourself questions like:

– What went wrong?

– What could I have done differently?

– What did I learn from this experience?

Be honest with yourself about your role in the situation and what you could have done better.

But also be kind to yourself and remember that mistakes are a natural part of the learning process.

We tend to view mistakes as failures and feel ashamed or embarrassed when we make them. It’s easy to beat yourself up over past mistakes, but this can be counterproductive.

Instead of dwelling on your mistakes, use them as opportunities to learn and grow. Don’t use past mistakes as a reason to avoid challenges—this will only keep you where you are now.

Don’t repeat the same mistakes you made before—learn from them.

7. Keeping the wrong people in your life (for the wrong reasons).

A man and a woman sit on a couch, engaged in a conversation. The man in a green shirt gestures with his hand, while the woman in a light green shirt raises one hand, with a questioning expression. They are in a bright room with large windows.

Knowing whom you shouldn’t be spending time with is incredibly important. When you’re bouncing back from whatever hole you’ve found yourself in, be selective about the company you keep.

There are those whose hands (and words) will help pull you out of it and those that want to shove you back down again.

We often keep people in our lives longer than we should out of obligation or misplaced loyalty. But people flow in and out of our lives all the time: for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.

Take note of who raises you up, and who puts you down.

If they’re constantly criticizing instead of encouraging you and offering to help you, then it may be time to cut them loose.

If you can’t cut ties for various reasons, then create distance. Don’t interact with them unless you absolutely have to and remain in “gray rock” mode if and when you do.

8. Avoiding risk and challenge for fear of making a mistake.

A person in a gray t-shirt sits on the floor with hands clasped in front of their face, appearing to be in deep thought or distress. There's a gray sofa and a wooden shelf in the background, next to a sunlit window with white curtains.

It’s likely that many of the challenges you’ve experienced up until this point have caused you distress, and even led you to where you are now.

As such, you may shy away from challenges because you assume you’ll end up getting hurt. Maybe you think that if you never try anything, you won’t risk feeling incompetent.

Instead, see these challenges as opportunities for growth and learning.

Challenges force us to learn new skills or different ways of doing something, especially if the way we’ve been doing something has not been working.

Challenges forge resilience within us. We learn how to persevere and how to bounce back when things don’t go to plan.

Challenges can build our self-confidence and self-esteem as we accomplish the things we set out to do.

So embrace the challenges of life. Don’t hide from them.

9. Setting unrealistic, unachievable goals for yourself.

A man in a blue hoodie writes in a notebook while a woman in a yellow sweater uses a calculator. They are surrounded by documents and receipts on a wooden table, focusing on budgeting or financial planning.

Whilst it’s great to aim high, setting unattainable goals is only going to lead to more despair when you realize you’ll never achieve them.

If you’re trying to get your life back on track, you’ll want to set some solid goals to achieve.

Aim for “SMART” goals: those that are Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-Sensitive.

This requires you to be clear about the things you want to attain, have means with which to measure your progress, and set a period of time in which to get them done.

10. Letting disorganization be your downfall.

A man in pajamas is sitting on a messy bed, tossing a rolled-up piece of clothing towards an overflowing laundry basket. The background shows a disorganized room with clothes and other items scattered around.

Don’t let chaos hold you back. Get a large wall calendar and write down your goals so that you get constant visual reminders. Then set phone or email alerts to remind you what to do, and when.

Additionally, use routines and “habit stacking” as a means of staying on track.

For example, get into the habit of washing dishes as soon as you finish a meal so they don’t pile up.

As for habit stacking, consider something you do regularly that you can “stack” onto. Do you do your weekly grocery shopping every Saturday afternoon? Then clean out your fridge every Saturday morning to discard old items and make room for the new ones.

11. Giving up too easily.

A stressed man sits at a desk with two laptops, surrounded by crumpled papers. He holds his head with one hand while writing on a sheet of paper with the other. Shelves with books and a closed door are visible in the background.

Nothing worth achieving ever happened overnight. It’s going to take time to build back up from the place you’re in now, and that’s okay.

The key is to ensure that you remain diligent with your efforts rather than getting slack about them.

Having patience is not always easy because we want immediate change and improvement, especially when things are so dire now.

Keep yourself motivated with little rewards—as well as with pride in your accomplishments—and keep putting one foot in front of the other.

12. Being inflexible when things don’t go to plan.

A woman with long brown hair and wearing a pink sweater and blue jeans sits on the floor against a wall, looking distressed. She rests her forehead on her hand and has an expression of concern, with a bed and wardrobe visible in the background.

Life is unpredictable, and sometimes our plans don’t work out as we intended. When this happens, it’s important to be flexible and adapt to the new circumstances.

One way to make course-corrections is to regularly evaluate your progress toward your goals. Are you making the progress you hoped for? Are there any obstacles or setbacks that are preventing you from moving forward? If so, take some time to reassess your plan and make adjustments as needed.

Another way to make course-corrections is to seek feedback from others. Sometimes, we can be too close to our own goals to see where we might be going off track. Ask trusted friends, family members, or colleagues for their input on your progress and any areas where they think you could improve.

Finally, don’t be afraid to pivot if necessary. Sometimes, the best course-correction is to change your goals entirely. If you find that your current path is no longer fulfilling or leading you in the direction you want to go, it’s okay to make a change. Just make sure that any new goals are aligned with your values and priorities, and that you’re willing to put in the work to achieve them.

13. Stretching yourself too thin and neglecting balance.

A man with a beard is lying on a couch, wearing a light-colored t-shirt and beige pants. He has his eyes closed and is pinching the bridge of his nose, appearing to be stressed or exhausted. The couch is decorated with several patterned and plain cushions.

No matter what you do in life, the middle road is almost always the right route to take. When a pendulum has swung too far in one direction, momentum will often cause it to swing too far in the opposite direction.

Learn to listen to yourself, read the signs your body and mind are sending you, and push only as hard as is sustainable in the long term.

If you’re working at a constant deficit in terms of what you can realistically achieve, you’ll grind yourself down and might end up right back in the pit you’re trying to escape from.

14. Not celebrating the little wins and small progress.

A woman with shoulder-length hair and wearing a sleeveless top is standing outdoors with a blurred background of trees. She is touching her forehead with her hand and appears to be pensive or stressed.

It’s important to keep yourself inspired as you move toward the place you want to be.

Having regular rewards can improve your morale and give you things to look forward to, which can be a great motivation when and if you feel your willpower flagging.

One of the best ways to keep going is to have rewards that align with the goals you’re setting for yourself.

For example, if you’ve been working towards getting yourself a new place to live and you’ve made progress on that front, you could reward yourself by buying a housewarming present that you’d like. Even if you aren’t in that new place yet, this lovely item will inspire you to keep going.

Remember, however, that the greatest reward is the accomplishment itself, not the cookie that you get for doing a good job. Hold to a more mature mindset and learn to appreciate the fruits of your labor rather than external validations.

15. Focusing on perfection rather than “good enough”.

A young person with long hair pulled back is outdoors, wearing a light-colored long sleeve top. They have their hands placed on their head and appear to be looking into the distance. The background is softly blurred, indicating a natural setting.

Don’t beat yourself up if something you do isn’t exactly right or exactly how you want it to be. Accept that most things only need to be “good enough,” not perfect.

If we’re using the clean house example we established earlier, aim for “tidy and comfortably lived in” rather than “immaculate and sterilized.”

If you can see your kitchen counters (and they’re tidy), and you have clean sheets on your bed, that’s okay. That’s good. You don’t have to be perfect—just functional.

Focus on the process—and your progress—rather than the outcome.

16. Not reaching out for support when you need it.

A man with glasses sits on a couch, looking down thoughtfully, with his hands clasped. A woman beside him gently touches his shoulder, offering comfort and support. The room is softly lit with sunlight coming through a window.

It’s vitally important to acknowledge when you need help and to use all available resources to support you as you move forward.

You’ve reflected upon how you got into this mess and are resolved to never go down that path again. Now you’ll need to establish a support system that will prevent you from repeating past errors.

In addition to friends, family members, and accountability partners, you can see which supports are available around you. If you’re part of a faith community, there may be counselors or volunteers who can help you out, whether that’s with hands-on help or respite care for dependents so you don’t get overwhelmed.

If you’re stuck on figuring out how to get your life back on track, especially if you’re coming from a place where you’ve lost everything, consider getting professional help. No matter what circumstances you’re in, there are people who can assist you with counseling and resources so you can move forward.

As long as you’re still drawing breath, you can get your life back on track. There are things you can do to fix your life, often with a little help and support. Take a deep breath, your journey is renewed right here, right now.

You can do this.