10 Blunt Reasons Your Partner Is Pushing You Away (That Don't All Mean It's Over)

Is it the beginning of the end?

A woman sits next to a man on a couch. She appears concerned, looking at him while he gazes downward with his hands clasped together, seemingly deep in thought. The background is softly lit with white curtains.

The reason for your partner’s change in behavior doesn’t have to mean that they don’t care about you anymore. The problem might have roots in their past and have nothing to do with you.

There are many possible reasons why someone might push you away. Read through them and try to figure out what could best describe your specific situation. You’ll need to find out the reason to get to the root of the problem.

1. They are scared of letting you in.

A woman with blonde hair lies on her side in bed, looking down and appearing upset. A man with short dark hair sits beside her, gesturing with his hand as if trying to communicate. Both are dressed in casual white clothing, and the bed is white.

A fear of intimacy causes people to push their loved ones away.

They are afraid of getting hurt, possibly because of a bad experience in the past. If your partner avoids intimacy, it is to preserve themselves from possible heartbreak or rejection. They may have painful experiences from their past relationships. They are scared of letting you in and allowing you to hurt them. The thought of a close relationship makes them uncomfortable, so they push you away.

2. They had a difficult childhood.

A young child with long brown hair and wearing a blue jacket looks thoughtfully through wooden stair railings, holding one rail with her hand. The background is softly lit, highlighting the wooden texture of the stairs.

The reason your partner pushes you away might have roots in their childhood. If their parent or caregiver couldn’t meet their needs for intimacy in childhood, they may have adopted an avoidant attachment style. They are too afraid to form close relationships as adults because they’re scared they’ll get let down again, like in their childhood.

People with avoidant attachment styles often prefer casual relationships, and they tend to leave relationships when they start to get serious. They can sometimes cling to a partner and push them away and go back and forth between these things.

So the reason your partner pushes you away might be that they have an avoidant attachment style. If it’s too different than your attachment style, it’s likely the explanation for your problems.

3. They had bad past experiences with relationships.

A man and a woman sit on a couch, engaged in a conversation. The man in a green shirt gestures with his hand, while the woman in a light green shirt raises one hand, with a questioning expression. They are in a bright room with large windows.

Previous experiences with relationships might have left your partner with trust issues.

This trauma is especially true if their past partner lied to them or cheated on them. They may have felt betrayed when it happened, and they may now have trouble trusting people, fearing that it will happen again.

If your partner has trust issues, they might find it hard to open up to you. They might get jealous for no reason, constantly check up on you and act emotionally unavailable.

They might find it hard to trust themselves too. If they’ve made mistakes in the past, they could be scared that they’ll make the same ones again. If they have a lot of self-doubts and feel guilty about their past mistakes, it could be the reason why they push you away.

4. They don’t want to fall for you.

A person dressed in white sits at a table with a salad in front of them, while another person pours red wine into their glass. The setting appears to be a modern, well-lit restaurant with wooden shelves and minimalist decor in the background.

If your partner doesn’t want to connect with you, they’ll push you away. While so many people search for love, some prefer not to fall in love.

This attitude could be due to bad past experiences or simply because they are not ready for love in their life. They tend to keep quiet about their feelings and push someone away when they’re feeling vulnerable and like they’re falling in love. They prefer not to open up because getting close to someone could make them fall for them. There are many reasons why your partner might not want to fall for you, so consider whether this is the answer to your problems.

5. They don’t like you.

A man smiling and offering a bouquet of flowers to a woman who appears uninterested or uncomfortable. They are seated at a table in a bright setting with a window view. The woman is leaning back with a skeptical expression.

Sadly, the reason why your partner pushes you away might be because they don’t like you enough. People don’t want to get close to those they don’t like and don’t intend to keep in their life for long.

Maybe your partner cared about you before, but they don’t feel the same way anymore. If they don’t want to be around you and you don’t talk anymore, they want out. Maybe they’re afraid of breaking your heart, so they’re pushing you away to let you know that they’re not interested.

It’s not fair, but you can’t make someone like you. You deserve to be with someone who truly enjoys you.

6. They are interested in someone else.

A man in a white t-shirt and plaid pajama pants sits on a bed engrossed in his smartphone. Behind him, a woman in a casual dress sits with her knees drawn up, looking at him with a neutral expression. The room is softly lit by sunlight streaming through the window blinds.

Your partner might not be present when they’re with you because they have someone else on their mind. The sad fact is, they could be having an affair or thinking about having one.

Someone might have caught their interest even if they did nothing about it yet. They’re pushing you away because they know that they’re not supposed to have feelings for someone else. If they spend a lot of time on the phone and hide it from you, they might be talking to the person they’re interested in.

These feelings might confuse them even if they didn’t do anything about them yet. They need time and space to think about what they really want.

7. They need space.

A woman in a mustard sweater kneels on the floor, crying and clinging to the leg of a man standing beside her with a suitcase. The scene appears to take place in a living room with a couch and lamp in the background.

There are plenty of reasons why your partner might need space. One of them is if they’ve been feeling suffocated in the relationship. If you’ve been acting clingy and wanting to spend all your time with them, they could feel like they have no room to breathe.

They could also need space if they are thinking about someone else or considering ending the relationship. Sometimes, people use this phrase when they want to break up, but it can also mean other things. Your partner might need more alone time and time to focus on their personal or professional projects.

8. They are bored in the relationship.

A man and woman sit at a table in an outdoor cafe, both resting their heads on their hands and looking downcast. The woman has long blonde hair and is wearing a white top and pink skirt. The man has short dark hair and is wearing a blue shirt.

Your partner might have gotten bored in the relationship.

Fortunately, this is one of the best reasons because it’s not that hard to fix. If you’ve been together for a while and ran out of things to do, you can always try new fun activities and make things interesting. And if things get boring in the bedroom, you can always spice them up.

On the other hand, your partner could be bored with you in the sense that they want to be with someone new.

If your partner has already made up their mind about the relationship, nothing will help. Sometimes people get bored of being with someone. While you might not be boring at all, there’s not much you can do to make yourself interesting to your partner if they’ve decided they’re done with the relationship.

9. They are considering ending the relationship.

A woman with long dark hair looks serious and distant in the foreground. In the background, a man in a denim shirt covers his face with his hands, standing on a city street with blurred buildings and people. The scene suggests tension between them.

Your partner might be trying to break up with you by pushing you away. Breaking up with someone is never easy, and there’s no way you could do it without looking bad. You may try to avoid doing it when you know that you’ll break someone’s heart.

Instead, you push them away, avoid facing them, and get distant, hoping they’ll get the message and leave on their own. Sadly, this is how some people think; they fear confronting their partner about their need to end things.

On the other hand, maybe your partner is just considering ending the relationship, and they aren’t sure what they want, but they have thought about leaving you. If this is the case, you might get them to open up to you about what’s bothering them and work on fixing the issue.

10. They are mad at you.

A woman with red hair sits on a couch, resting her chin on her hand, looking thoughtful and slightly distressed. A man with greying hair sits beside her, turned away and looking out the window. Both appear to be in a tense or reflective mood.

Naturally, your partner could push you away simply because they are mad at you. If you did something to hurt or upset them, maybe they’re just not done being mad at you because of it.

They might be considering ending the relationship. However, they might still be processing their hurt feelings instead. If you apologize to them and try to make things right again, they might stop pushing you away.

This is actually one of the best reasons why someone might act differently all of a sudden. With some effort, it’s not that hard to fix things. Keep reading to learn more about ways to repair your relationship.