If you don't know what to do with your life, these 12 steps will give you an answer

“I don’t know what to do with my life”

A person with long blonde hair sits indoors, looking thoughtfully out of a window. They are wearing a light blue blazer and have their hands clasped under their chin. The background features a decorative wall and green plants.

This is a thought that spins around your head on an almost daily basis.

You’re looking for answers—something, anything that can point you in the right direction toward a life of fulfilment. You want a purpose, a reason for getting out of bed in the morning, a goal or goals to work toward. But you come up short every time you search for these things.

Don’t worry, you are not alone. In fact, you are a part of the largest group of people on this planet. You don’t know what to do with your life and you don’t know how to find out either.

The first thing to understand is that this is perfectly normal; people are not born knowing what their ultimate role in society is going to be. Instead, they are born with endless possibilities from which to discover their calling. The problem is that while the choice is immense, the choosing is ever so difficult.

What’s more, life is in constant flux and the right choice changes as your journey unravels. No wonder so many of us find ourselves with a nagging feeling that there might be so much more out there if we could only reach it.

If you’ve stumbled across this article, chances are that you are one of these people. Perhaps you’re in high school, college, or further education, maybe you’re out in the world of work, or you might not be in either right now. It doesn’t matter what your situation is.

What matters is that you can do the introspective soul-searching, figure out your dreams, and make the changes necessary to turn those dreams into reality. You don’t have to narrow it down to one thing—you can keep your options open to some extent based on your strengths and the aspects of your passions that you would most like to incorporate into your life.

With this in mind, here are some pointers for you to follow that should steer you in the right direction to finally uncover the thing(s) you really want to achieve in life.

1. Don’t think you have to plan it all out.

A woman sits at a desk, looking frustrated as she works on her laptop. She rests her head on her hand and leans forward, appearing focused and concerned. In the background, there are shelves with binders and a potted plant.

“The future’s not ours to see” are lyrics from a famous Doris Day song and they are true to a large extent. We may only begin to imagine what life has in store for us and we shouldn’t fall into the trap of thinking we need to plan for our entire lifetimes.

You just can’t ever know what might be around the corner; your health, your work situation, your family, and the wider society may all see considerable change and many things cannot be planned for.

You can, however, look forward in the short term and try to do as many things that bring you joy as you can. Whether this involves your job or simply your hobbies, by chasing positive moments, we can at least make the journey more enjoyable.

A by-product of this approach is that you may discover hidden talents or desires purely by seeking out opportunities to experience true happiness.

And for those things you aren’t able to foresee, you can only try to roll with the punches and take them as they come. Uncertainty cannot be avoided and some events will bring about great turmoil; one way to cope is to try to view each negative as a positive waiting to happen – if you make it one.

2. Embrace discomfort to achieve happiness.

A man wearing a gray sweater is sitting indoors, holding his glasses in one hand and rubbing his eyes with the other, appearing tired or stressed. Behind him are a small potted plant and some books on the table.

Life’s road is rarely ever smooth, which means that you’re going to come across stretches of great discomfort. Whether that is a physical lack of money that prevents you from doing something or an emotional earthquake that turns your world upside down, you just have to accept that knocks and bumps cannot be totally avoided.

Each time you experience such discomfort, you will learn a little more about yourself and what your wishes are for the future. You will find out what you are and are not willing to endure and this will guide you towards more suitable waypoints along your journey.

For instance, you may initially want to become a lawyer, but find yourself 3 years into your training with many more years ahead of you, virtually penniless, working 70 hour weeks and dreadfully unhappy. You have undergone a period of great discomfort, but you’ve learned where your limits are with regards to pushing your mind and body for the purpose of a career. You can now adjust your course and seek different opportunities that better fit with your mental and physical tolerances.

3. Ditch the distractions and pull away from procrastination.

A woman rests her head on one hand while intently stacking paper cups into a pyramid on a desk. She appears focused, with a laptop and phone nearby. The setting is a mix of casual and work environment.

“I don’t know what to do with my life” sometimes leads to “I’m not going to do anything about it right now.”

Never forget that time waits for no man. You may want to discover and chase a dream, but you won’t be able to do so if you keep putting off the inevitable. Maintain your hobbies, your family time and other things that you truly value, but seize all of the otherwise wasted time and do something with it.

Uncovering your ideal path in life is not without its own hard work and effort. You need to put your mind to work, engage your body and utilize what time you have.

Research potential avenues of work, speak to people with experience in the field, even volunteer if possible to get a sense of whether or not it is right for you. You can’t ever tell for sure how much you’ll enjoy something until you’ve got your hands dirty doing it for a while. And you can only do that if you stop making excuses and stop finding ways to waste your time.

4. Ask questions (both big & small).

A man with a beard and short hair sits on a red leather couch, looking pensively out the window. He is wearing a maroon button-up shirt, and there is a potted plant in the background with large windows letting in natural light.

You can’t gain knowledge without asking some questions, but when you are searching for a driving purpose to guide your future movements in life, you’ll often need to ask yourself and not others.

Sometimes you’ll find the big questions helpful, such as what you are most passionate about, where you stand on major moral issues, what would you prioritize if money and time were no object – that sort of thing.

Other times, it might be the smaller questions that help you to refine your direction. Do you like working in an office environment? Do you prefer city, town, or country living? How many social activities is enough for you? Is downtime important to you?

The more you explore these and other questions, the closer you come to understanding who you are and what your ideal calling is in life (or, at least, in your current stage of life).

5. Be willing to make sacrifices in the short term.

A woman wearing glasses and a striped shirt sits at a desk, focused on a computer screen. She holds a sheet of paper and has a glass with a red drink nearby. The background features illuminated screens and a dimly lit room.

Right now you probably feel lost; you don’t know what to do with your life and you want to reach a place where you do. However, between where you are now and where you wish to be, there is a hard road to travel.

Discomfort is something that has already been mentioned, but something else that you might have to get used to is sacrifice.

You see, we only have so much time and energy at our disposal and while you may currently find ways to use up both, if you want to take that leap to a life of more contentment, you will almost certainly have to give up some of the things you currently take for granted.

Perhaps, after doing your research and asking yourself the right questions, you decide that you want to start a business. But you don’t yet have the necessary money to get it off the ground. You may have to put in extra hours at your current job, be more frugal with your spending, and even give up current luxuries like flash cars and foreign holidays in order to make your dream a reality.

You must be willing to forego in the present to thrive in the future, because if you are not, you will struggle to change your situation and move along the path to happiness.

6. When opportunity knocks, be ready to answer.

A person in a yellow sweater is sitting at a table with documents, a smartphone, and two water bottles. They are smiling and looking at another individual with blonde hair seated across from them. The setting appears to be a professional or interview environment.

Sometimes you have to spot the opportunities that come knocking at your door and you have to be willing to answer their call. Remember, trying something out is one of the most effective ways to discover how suitable it is for you, so when life seeks to show you the way, don’t ignore it – grab on with both hands and see where it takes you.

You might worry that it’s not the right time or the right opportunity, but you will never know unless you take a leap and find out.

Sitting on your hands and doing nothing is a choice, but it is one that you will most likely regret as you grow older. People rarely regret their adventures, but they often regret not going on one in the first place.

7. Align yourself with a cause or find something you’re passionate about.

A diverse group of people smiling and celebrating, holding trash bags and wearing gloves, indicating a successful community cleanup. They stand outdoors with trees in the background.

Perhaps when you think “I don’t know what to do with my life,” you end the statement with, “but I want to do something!”

You want to do something important, something meaningful, something good. You want your life to matter, to make a difference, to make the world a better place. That’s a good attitude to have.

But how?

Align yourself with a cause or hobby that gets you fired up. A cause is typically a way of improving the lives of people or animals or the environment. It often seeks to right an injustice of sorts, but it could also involve advancing human understanding or technology.

There are endless different causes or hobbies that often relate to one specific thing or group or angle. Is there something that you feel strongly about? If so, that’s a good place to start. If you don’t know what cause is right for you, there’s nothing stopping you from getting involved with a few to see which feels most closely aligned with your values and beliefs.

But it’s typically a good idea to settle on one cause if you can. This will allow you to devote more time and energy to it which helps reinforce your passion for it.

If you spread yourself too thinly across multiple causes, you risk reducing the potential overall impact you have.

It’s important to note that aligning yourself with a cause doesn’t mean you have to necessarily align yourself with an organization or charity. You can do something with your life just by yourself, though as we’ll discuss later, it can be good to join with others doing the same thing.

8. Find ways that you can contribute.

A bearded man wearing a checkered shirt is holding a wooden crate filled with ripe tomatoes. He is smiling and reaching towards a tomato plant in a lush green garden or greenhouse.

To contribute is to give, and that can mean different things to different people. But it can be a great way to find meaning in your life.

You might want to get hands-on and actively involved in doing things that relate to the cause.

This might mean volunteering your time to walk abandoned dogs at a shelter, or spending one evening a week at a soup kitchen.

You might feel that you have skills that an organization could use. This could range from web design expertise to access to transport for people, goods, and materials.

Whether it’s on the frontline or more behind the scenes, every role is valuable and necessary if a real difference is to be made.

And you aren’t limited to one form of contribution. What you give can vary and adapt based on your lifestyle, your skills, and the needs of the cause you are aligned to.

Perhaps you hand out warm clothes to the homeless, escort them to a meeting with social services, or help them fill out forms if they struggle to read and write.

Maybe you help with the administrative tasks of a local charity, but are also a key part of their fundraising drives because of your ties to the local press or your digital marketing knowledge.

Or perhaps your contribution will be primarily financial. Perhaps you donate to a charity or organization that does great work you believe in.

Money is vital to any effective cause, and if you feel you are best placed to work hard, earn a good living, and donate some of that income to a cause you care about, that’s great.

You shouldn’t feel like your contribution is any less than those of people who give their time and energy directly. You are still doing something with your life by diverting a percentage of your earnings to a worthy cause, and that donation can be what drives you to strive harder in your career or business.

9. Never underestimate your contributions.

A woman with short white hair smiles and touches the shoulder of another woman wearing a blue sweater. They are seated in a circle with two other people, suggesting a supportive group meeting.

You might believe that to really do some good in your life, you need to give lots of your time and/or money.

But that’s simply not the case at all. Every action matters – big and small.

It matters because it is one action more than no action whatsoever. And if it’s something you do on a regular basis, it really begins to add up.

Let’s say you pick up litter from a local park or woodland near you once a fortnight, and that each time you collect a carrier bag full. Well, by the end of the year, that’s 26 bags full of rubbish that you’ve removed – imagine those 26 bags piled high and you’ll see how big a difference you make.

Or perhaps you provide an hour of respite care each week for someone who looks after an elderly or disabled relative. It might seem like a short time, but for that person, that hour is a lifeline that they are no doubt very grateful for. And, again, looked at over a year, it equates to well over a standard working week of your time – not trivial by any means.

Even if your contribution is even smaller, it’s important to look at it as something of worth. Because you know what, it really is.

And if you ever look at the bigger picture and feel depressed or defeated by it, try to focus on the difference you are making to the individual people or creatures whose lives you touch. When things seem bleak, they will provide the spark you need to keep going.

Simply pay attention to all the little ways your actions change the lives of someone else or some other creature. Allow these things to change your perspective on your contribution to society. Have confidence in your power to make an impact based on the decisions you make and the actions you take.

10. Connect with other people involved in your passion.

A speaker stands in front of a large audience in a conference room, with participants raising their hands. The focus is on the audience, while a blurred presentation screen is visible in the background.

You can do a lot of good by yourself, through your own actions. But there’s a lot to be said about seeking out people who are equally as passionate about something as you.

First and foremost, there is the sense of community that it brings. If you share something important with a group of people, it’s inevitable that you will form a bond over this thing.

You may begin to consider some of these people as true friends, or they may just remain acquaintances that you see regularly.

Either way, being a part of a community provides a sense of real purpose because the combined time and energy you all put in leads to even greater and more tangible results.

What’s more, a group of like-minded individuals will inevitably feed off each other’s passion and commitment. You will push one another to do more (assuming you want to) and a community provides the motivation to keep going.

Another benefit of getting involved with others is that you will feel a sense of belonging. If you find yourself wanting to do something with your life, it may simply be that you don’t feel like you belong anywhere in particular right now.

11. Regularly check in with yourself to see how you feel about the life you’re creating.

A woman with a ponytail sits on a teal sofa, gazing thoughtfully upwards. Her elbows rest on her knees, and she wears a gray long-sleeve shirt and jeans. The room is softly lit, with a large window in the background.

Sometimes we lose interest or passion for something. It’s a natural part of the ever-changing landscape of our lives.

But when you have committed yourself to something for a period of time, it can be hard to let go of it, even if it is no longer what you wish to do.

But if the cause or passion no longer resonates with you, or your life has changed in a way that makes it challenging to continue with, you should feel able to stop contributing or adapt how you contribute.

You may find that an event – personal or otherwise – reveals a new cause or interest you wish to support and get involved with. If this is something that inspires you to act, it is definitely worth pursuing further.

But, if you don’t have the time, energy, or money to dedicate to a current interest and a new one, it’s okay to call time on your efforts relating to the old one.

Your most meaningful action is taken from the place of your greatest passion, and if that passion moves or evolves, you should go where it takes you.

It is worth highlighting, however, that some causes will involve confronting difficult emotions and that these will sometimes weigh heavily on you. If they relate to a cause you are really passionate about, you just have to keep reminding yourself why you are doing what you are doing.

For example, helping people overcome traumatic experiences in their lives is a very worthwhile thing, but it’s inevitably going to bring with it some emotional load. You may have to listen to things that are difficult to hear and be present as people express all sorts of thoughts and feelings.

Whilst you should always prioritize your own well-being, you may find the work you do with such a cause very challenging. It’s good to be aware of this and to prepare for it so that you can better cope with it.

And if it ever does get too much for you to handle, you shouldn’t feel guilty for taking a break, finding a new way to contribute, or leaving it behind altogether.

12. Match your career to your cause or passionate interest.

A teacher leans over to assist a young boy with his work in a classroom. Other students are working at their desks. The setting is bright, with colorful classroom decorations and a world map on the wall.

Sometimes, though not always, it is possible to make a living from the cause or passion you align yourself to.

This could be a career in the relevant field…

Perhaps you find a job as a biologist because the understanding and protection of the natural world is something you care deeply about.

Maybe you become a solicitor working on behalf of people who have suffered prejudice and discrimination.

Most causes will involve a great variety of work, and there are sure to be organizations with a range of careers open to you.

Working full-time in a job that is closely tied to the cause or interest you are dedicated to can be very rewarding indeed.

Then there is the possibility of starting something yourself – a business, charity, or other form of organization – that contributes to your particular cause or interest.

Passionate about reducing carbon emissions? You could launch a renewable energy company, become a specialist installer of the latest high-performance insulation, or even start a consultancy advising companies how they can be greener.

Want to give unloved or unwanted pets a good home? You could setup a non-profit shelter and take a wage from the funding and donations you receive.

Would you like to improve the quality of life for people with a specific disability? You could design, manufacture, and sell products tailored to their exact needs. Even if it’s quite niche, there still scope to make a living from it.

This step is optional because, let’s face it, not everyone is going to be able to find work in the area they are most interested in. But even if you are unable to, you can still try to find ways to bring your cause or interest into the company you work for.

For example, you could arrange company events that give back to the cause you care deeply for. Or you might consider campaigning for the company to enact policies that relate to that cause.