12 Signs Someone Has Reached Breaking Point With Their Partner

Look out for these 12 signs of relationship decline.

A man and a woman are sitting close together, both gazing thoughtfully into the distance. The man, in a white shirt, is in the foreground, while the woman, with long hair and a green top, is slightly out of focus in the background.

Most people know when their relationship has declined to the point where they just can’t take it anymore. This is known as the “breaking point”, and there are several different signs that indicate that a person has either reached it or will do so momentarily.

1. They try to spend as much time away from their partner as possible.

A woman in an office is illuminated by a computer screen while holding a smartphone. She is seated at a desk with a keyboard, coffee cup, and stationery. The background shows city lights through a window, indicating nighttime.

They might work late into the evening and then go back into the office as early as they can, then spend weekends running errands or going on business trips. If they’re stuck at home with their partner, they’ll cook, clean, or try to go out with friends — anything to create distance between them.

2. The only emotions they feel for their partner are anger and resentment.

A woman is slicing oranges at a kitchen counter while looking at a man who is adjusting his tie. The counter is filled with breakfast items, including coffee cups, croissants, and oranges. The kitchen is modern with white shelves and a brick wall.

When they look at their partner, they don’t feel any love or tenderness anymore. All they think about when observing them is how much resentment they feel for everything they’ve put them through, and anger about the fact that they’ve been stuck with this person for so long.

3. They argue over everything.

A man and woman stand outside in a park setting. The woman, wearing a green shirt, appears surprised or upset, pointing at the man. The man, in a blue checkered shirt, has his hands open in a questioning gesture. Trees and plants are in the background.

They’re likely to pick fights with their partner about pretty much anything. They might have put a spoon back into the drawer the wrong way, or they bought the wrong brand of toilet paper. There’s always something to fight about, and there’s rarely any peace in the house anymore.

4. They seem perpetually irritable.

A man with a thoughtful expression sits on a couch, resting his chin on his hand, wearing a light shirt. A woman in a white top sits behind him, leaning back with her arms crossed, holding a blue cushion. The setting is a cozy living room.

Everyone has to walk on eggshells around them because they get irritated by everything. They’ll snap at their partner if the toaster they’re using pops too loudly, or if they’re breathing annoyingly. They’re a ticking time bomb of anger and irritability and literally anything could set them off.

5. They avoid physical contact.

A man with a beard in a yellow sweater sits on a bench, looking serious, with autumn leaves in the background. A woman next to him in a cream sweater gazes at the camera. The scene is set in a park during fall.

They’ll cringe away from physical contact with their partner as though they might get burned by touching them. They might choose to sleep separately and avoid hugs, kisses, or any other casual touch. They’ll seem disgusted if their partner reaches for them. All physical intimacy with them is forbidden, forever.

6. They respond with vitriol whenever their partner’s name is mentioned.

Two women are seated and engaged in conversation at an outdoor café. The woman on the left is speaking, while the woman on the right listens attentively with a thoughtful expression. Both have long hair and are casually dressed, with sunglasses resting on their heads.

If someone asks what their partner has been up to, they might say something like, “Nothing, as usual”, or a similar derogatory comment. In their mind, the connection has already been severed, and they don’t want to be reminded of the dead meat they’re still attached to for the time being.

7. They’re “checked out”.

A woman with long brown hair looks pensive while sitting at a table. A man with glasses is seated beside her, slightly out of focus. The setting appears to be a neutral-toned room.

They may appear to exist in a completely different dimension, with glazed, unfocused eyes and little to no reaction to what’s going on around them. They’ve numbed themselves as much as possible to the miseries of their relationship, and might not notice if people are screaming or throwing things all around them.

8. They don’t have anything good to say about their partner.

Two young men are sitting on a wooden bench on a cobblestone street. One is wearing a navy blue shirt with his arms crossed and facing the other, who is in a grey plaid shirt, engaged in conversation. Both have short hair and are dressed casually in jeans.

If someone mentions that their partner is looking good, they might laugh and say it’s great that others think so. Similarly, if a friend mentions something positive about their own spouse, the one who’s reached a breaking point will bemoan their own partner so that others think badly about them too.

9. They’re ill a lot.

A woman sitting on a sofa holds her stomach with both hands, appearing uncomfortable. She is wearing a white shirt and blue jeans. In the background, there's a bright room with a window and a potted plant.

They may suffer from chronic migraines, insomnia, digestive issues, anxiety, and/or depression, which are all physical and emotional manifestations of how they feel about their relationship. If they feel unable to express what they’re feeling, their body and mind will suffer from that internalization.

10. They start talking about their own future plans.

Two men are having a conversation in a kitchen. The man on the right, wearing a mustard yellow sweater, is holding a white cup and appears to be speaking. The man on the left, facing away, is listening intently. The background shows white tiled walls and kitchenware.

They’ll use “me” language instead of “us” when discussing the future with friends or colleagues. What their partner wants doesn’t even come into the equation, because they don’t see this person as playing a role in how the rest of their life will unfold.

11. They get rid of things.

A person wearing a striped shirt and jeans places a pastel-colored long-sleeved shirt on a hanger. The shirt is partially inside a cardboard box, suggesting packing or unpacking. A closet with clothes is visible in the background.

A person who’s reached a breaking point with their partner may start to actively “declutter” their shared living space, and most of that decluttering will involve their partner’s possessions. They’ll throw out or donate whatever isn’t being used, or pack up items that they despise to get them out of view.

12. They stop doing anything for their partner’s benefit.

A man in a kitchen is gesturing in frustration at a pile of dirty dishes in the sink. Plates and utensils with food residue are scattered on the counter. A small plant and cleaning supplies are visible in the background.

If they’re doing the laundry, they’ll only wash their own clothes, and those of their children if they have any. They may only cook for themselves, clean their own dishes, buy their own food, etc. Essentially, they’re behaving as though they’re already single, despite still living with their spouse/partner.