Choosing a life partner is not only one of the most significant decisions we can make in our lives, but also one of the most overwhelming. Sure, there are some superficial qualities that come to mind when thinking about “the one” – height, athleticism, how they are in bed, etc. However, there are also certain qualities many people look for that not only enhance individual happiness, but also help contribute to a strong, resilient and healthy relationship. Here are just some of those qualities that make a near perfect partner you won’t want to let go.
1. They communicate respectfully.
Effective communication is the foundation of all healthy relationships, and research shows that it predicts marital satisfaction. A partner who has good communication skills can express themselves freely and listen to the other person’s needs and concerns. Having this quality is crucial in a relationship because it helps address underlying issues before they brew into a bigger problem, making both parties feel heard and valued.
Communication isn’t just about talking though, but listening as well, and importantly, understanding that not everyone communicates in the same way. We are often taught that “good” communication involves a certain set of rules such as eye contact, the “right” body position and so on. In reality, effective communication involves understanding each other’s particular ways and preferences, and finding a way to meet in the middle if they don’t always mesh with yours.
2. They are empathetic, even when they don’t truly understand what you are going through.
One aspect of healthy communication that is often overlooked is the ability to empathize with others. Besides, how else are we supposed to support our partner without understanding how they feel? The problem is, it’s actually very hard to understand how someone else feels, particularly if we haven’t shared their experience. And even if we have shared something similar, we won’t always process it in the same way.
True empathy isn’t just about “being able to put yourself in the other person’s shoes” and feel what they’re feeling. It’s about believing and acknowledging that their feelings are valid even when you don’t understand them. This helps to resolve conflicts and build emotional intimacy between both parties.
3. They don’t take life too seriously.
Life is too short to be serious all the time, so if your ideal partner isn’t able to laugh at themselves every once in a while, that shouldn’t be something to ignore. Sharing a laugh with your partner can not only strengthen the bond you share, but also help to make life itself a little more light-hearted and enjoyable. A fact that’s been backed by recent research.
4. They are willing and able to learn from their mistakes.
Every person carries emotional baggage and shortcomings when starting a relationship. However, what sets an emotionally mature person apart from others is their ability to take constructive criticism from others and learn from their mistakes. A partner who can recognize their own faults and improve on them also makes them more capable of addressing relationship challenges with sensitivity and understanding.
5. They share your values about the things that really matter.
No matter how much you and your ideal partner get along, no couple is always going to agree on everything, and that’s ok. But whether they pertain to family, finances or lifestyle choices, having shared values is crucial for creating a strong foundation within a relationship.
Of course, our values may change as we go through life, and our partner may change and shape our values for the better. But it helps if your values are identified and roughly aligned from the get-go, according to experts. When both partners share similar core beliefs, it can help simplify tough decisions and allow you to go through life as a team.
6. They show respect, and not just in your relationship.
Marriage experts advise that respect is integral to a happy, lifelong partnership. Why? Because when someone respects you, they respect your boundaries, whether they are emotional, physical or sexual.
Partners who are unlikely to respect you are unlikely to respect others too. So next time you want to test if your partner is “the one,” pay close attention to how they treat others. Are they rude or snippy to a waiter, baristas, or cashiers? These small interactions reveal volumes about someone’s character and their authentic self when they think nobody important is watching. If so, that is not the right person for you. If they treat strangers with disrespect, who’s to say they won’t eventually treat you that same way?
7. They are reliable and consistent.
Your ideal life partner should be someone you know you can count on. Whether it’s being a shoulder to cry on during tough times or following through on commitments, being the kind of person people can depend on creates a sense of security in a relationship, as well as strengthening the bond between you and your partner. This steadfast dependability isn’t just about grand gestures; it’s about consistently showing up in all the small, everyday moments that truly build a life together.
8. They demonstrate honesty and integrity, even when it’s tough.
As the popular saying goes, honesty is always the best policy. This is especially true in healthy relationships, particularly romantic ones. A partner who is open and upfront with you is a partner you would want to keep because not only does it strengthen your bond, but it allows you to feel safe and secure with each other. According to Psychology Today, this clear, honest communication also eliminates confusion and conflict because decisions are being made based on facts, not assumptions.
9. They have fire in their belly.
When you picture your perfect partner, do you imagine them as a success in their chosen career or passionate about a shared hobby? While your partner’s goals don’t have to be the same as your own, having an ambitious partner can help encourage both parties to pursue their dreams together. Their drive becomes contagious, inspiring you to reach higher and push beyond self-imposed limitations. Who wouldn’t be inspired by that?
10. They are adaptable, especially in challenging circumstances.
It’s no secret that life can be pretty unpredictable, but having a partner who can adapt to all of life’s surprises makes navigating the challenges that come with them so much easier. Someone who can roll with the punches rather than crumble under pressure becomes an invaluable ally in life’s journey. Adaptability allows for both sides to learn and grow from their experiences together while renewing a sense of excitement within the relationship.
11. They support you through good and bad.
A near perfect partner should be someone who actively supports your goals and celebrates your achievements, no matter how big or small they are. They’re your biggest cheerleader when you succeed and your most compassionate companion when you struggle, offering encouragement without judgment. Having this quality is important in a relationship because not only does it promote personal growth, it also fosters a nurturing environment that shows that you believe in each other, no matter what.
12. They don’t compromise their core identity for the relationship.
Just because you’re in a relationship doesn’t mean you have to compromise who you are. An ideal partner should not allow either of their identities to be based on each other. Rather, they maintain their individuality by seeing people and doing activities they enjoyed doing before their relationship, and encourage each other to step out of their comfort zones and try new things. This healthy separation creates space for personal development while simultaneously strengthening your connection through shared experiences of growth.
