12 Toxic Habits That Make You A Terrible Human Being

Do You Engage In These Behaviors?

A woman with long dark hair wears a light green blazer over a beige top, paired with jeans. She appears to be pointing towards the camera with an expressive look on her face, standing against a pink background.

You want to be a decent human being, right?

Who doesn’t?

Unfortunately, it can be easy to get caught up in our own lives and forget about the impact that our actions have on others.

Being a decent person is simple but not always easy. In other words, you probably know what to do already, but actually doing it is another matter.

And if you’re not being a decent human being? Well, then you’re being a pretty terrible one.

Still, with some effort and self-awareness, anyone can learn to be kinder and more compassionate, and make a positive contribution to the world.

If you recognize any of these toxic behaviors, you might want to find out how.

1. You don’t treat others as having equal inherent value.

A woman in a tan coat kneels to give change to a homeless man sitting on the sidewalk. The man, wearing a red hoodie under a brown coat, has a sign beside him that reads "Once I was like you." A bus is visible in the background with people walking by.

Every person has inherent value, and people who are committed to humanity recognize and honor that value in all interactions.

They don’t make assumptions about people based on their appearance, background, or other external factors. Instead, they take the time to get to know them as individuals and appreciate their unique qualities and perspectives.

Treating others as being of equal value requires a commitment to fairness, respect, and compassion. Are you prepared to do that?

2. You don’t respect differences.

Two women are having an intense conversation in a brightly lit room. The woman on the left, with curly hair and wearing a yellow crop top, has a concerned expression. The woman on the right, with straight hair and wearing a white shirt under a green overall dress, gestures emphatically.

Everyone has unique experiences, perspectives, and identities that shape who they are. Acknowledging and valuing these differences can help create a more inclusive, peaceful, and accepting society. Yet so many people who claim to be good, virtuous, respectful human beings fall very short here.

It’s important to be mindful of your own biases and assumptions while recognizing that your experiences and beliefs may not be universal.

Decent human beings respect boundaries and personal preferences. They understand that everyone has the right to their own beliefs, values, and identities, and that it’s important to respect those differences.

3. You choose greed over generosity.

A person with short brown hair and a red sleeveless top holds up a fanned stack of hundred-dollar bills, partially covering their face, while looking to the side. The background is a solid purple color.

Generosity is the act of giving without expecting anything in return. Greed, on the other hand, is the excessive desire for more than what is needed. And it’s very toxic. Choosing generosity over greed, therefore, means prioritizing the needs of others and being content with what you have. Do you do that?

Did you know that studies have shown that generosity leads to increased happiness, improved mental health, and even physical health benefits? When you choose to give to others, you are not only helping them but also improving your own well-being.

You can be generous by volunteering your time, donating to charity, or simply helping out a neighbor. Small acts of kindness can go a long way in making the world a better place.

4. You speak ill of others.

Two women sitting at a table in a café, sharing a secret. The woman on the left has red hair and is wearing a gray sweater, holding her hand over her mouth in surprise. The woman on the right has dark hair, wearing a dark green blouse, whispering into her friend's ear.

It is easy to fall into the trap of talking about others, but it is important to remember that doing so can hurt them and damage relationships.

When you speak ill of others, it reflects poorly on you and can also damage your reputation. People will be less likely to trust you and confide in you if they know that you gossip and speak negatively about others. They’ll treat you like you’re toxic, because that’s the impression you’re giving.

Decent people try to focus on the positive qualities of people. If you have a problem with someone, try to address it with them directly and respectfully. If you hear a person speaking ill of someone else, try to change the subject or politely tell them that you do not want to participate in gossip. It’s not as hard.

5. You don’t lift others up.

Two women are outdoors with green foliage in the background. The woman on the left has long, blonde hair and is smiling at the camera. The woman on the right has short, dark hair and is looking at the woman on the left with a gentle expression.

It is easy to focus on our own needs and desires, but true decency requires us to look beyond ourselves and help those around us. How many of these things have you done recently?

– Offered a kind word or compliment to someone.

– Listened attentively to someone who needed to talk and offered support and encouragement.

– Helped someone in need, whether they were a neighbor, friend, or stranger.

– Encouraged and celebrated the successes of others, rather than being envious or competitive.

If the answer is zero, you may want to consider whether you’re being that decent human being you think you are.

6. You make choices impulsively rather than consciously .

A woman with long brown hair, wearing a striped shirt, is gesturing and looking at a man in a white shirt and dark tie who is covering his face with his hands, appearing stressed or upset, in a bright room with natural light.

When we allow our emotions to control us, we often make decisions that we later regret. It’s important to take a step back, assess the situation, and make a thoughtful decision.

People who want to have a positive impact on the world try to take a deep breath and calm down before making a decision. They consider the consequences of their actions and think about what their values are and how their decision aligns with them.

By making choices consciously, they prevent actions that are toxic to themselves or others.

7. You don’t show gratitude when others help you.

Two women are sitting at a cafe table, engaged in conversation. One woman is holding a blue coffee cup, while the other has a black cup on the table. Both are dressed warmly, with scarves. The background features a window with bright daylight outside.

When someone does something nice for you or helps you out, it’s important to express your appreciation. The world, and its inhabitants, don’t owe you anything despite what you might think.

There are many ways to show gratitude, and it doesn’t have to be a grand gesture. A simple “thank you” can go a long way. Alternatively, you can write a thank-you note or card, buy them a small gift or treat, offer to help them with something in return, or give them a hug or handshake.

Remember, showing gratitude is not only polite, but it also helps to build strong relationships with others. So, the next time someone does something nice for you, take a moment to express your appreciation in a meaningful way. It’s what decent human beings do, after all.

8. You don’t take responsibility for your actions.

A woman with blonde hair, wearing a gray blazer and white shirt, sits at a desk and talks to a man in a suit. She gestures with one hand, possibly explaining something. They are in a bright office with large windows and several potted plants in the background.

Taking responsibility for your actions means owning up to your mistakes, acknowledging the impact your actions had on others, and making amends when necessary. It also means not trying to shift the blame onto others or making excuses for your behavior. That’s definitely a toxic thing to do.

When you take responsibility for your actions, you demonstrate integrity, accountability, and respect for others. You show that you are willing to learn from your mistakes and grow as a person. You also build trust and credibility with those around you.

Remember, taking responsibility for your actions is not always easy. It requires humility, honesty, and self-awareness. But it is an essential part of being a decent human being.

9. You’re closed-minded and judgmental.

A woman with short auburn hair is wearing large cat-eye sunglasses and a sleeveless top. She is touching the frame of her sunglasses with her left hand, showcasing a watch on her wrist. The background is blurred and appears to be a green outdoor setting.

Decent human beings are willing to consider different perspectives and ideas without immediately dismissing them based on preconceived notions or personal biases. They avoid making assumptions about people or situations without first gathering all the facts.

How often do you do any of the following? If the answer is not often, you’re probably more closed minded and judgmental than you realize:

-Trying to put yourself in other people’s shoes and understand their perspectives. Not making snap judgments based on incomplete information.

-Being aware of your own biases and trying to challenge them. Asking yourself why you believe certain things and considering whether there might be other valid viewpoints.

-Making a conscious effort to really listen when someone is talking. Not interrupting or dismissing their ideas before they’ve had a chance to fully explain them.

-Approaching new ideas and experiences with curiosity rather than skepticism. Asking questions and seeking out information to help you better understand unfamiliar concepts or perspectives.

Being open-minded and non-judgmental doesn’t mean you have to agree with everything you encounter. It simply means being willing to consider alternative viewpoints and treating others with respect. I think we can all agree that’s a more decent way of interacting with people.

10. You disrespect the boundaries of others.

A woman with long blonde hair stands outside an urban building, looking directly at the camera. She is wearing a tan coat over a blue-and-white pinstriped shirt and holds her hand out in front of her, with her palm open and facing the camera.

Everyone has their own limits and comfort zones, and it is not our place to push those boundaries.

Do you ask for consent before doing something that may affect a person? This could be something as simple as asking before hugging someone or asking before sharing personal information about them.

Do you listen to others when they express their needs or limits? If someone tells you that they are not comfortable talking about a certain topic, it is important to respect their wishes and avoid discussing it with them.

Do you understand that boundaries can change over time? What was once comfortable for someone may no longer be comfortable for them. It is important to check in with others periodically to make sure that you are still respecting their boundaries.

If you’re not doing these things, you’re not being respectful. And if you’re not being respectful, you’re not being a decent human being.

11. You show no consideration for the impact you have on nature.

A person in a gray jacket and camouflage hood throws a black garbage bag into a forest area with leafless trees and branches. The ground is covered with dry leaves. The scene depicts littering in nature.

Our actions can have a significant effect on the environment, and it is our responsibility to take steps to minimize that impact. Yet so many people who claim to be decent people, just don’t give a damn. It doesn’t get much more toxic than this.

We can do this by making small changes in our daily lives, such as using public transport or walking instead of driving, turning off lights when we leave a room, and buying fewer things that we might not actually need.

We should also try to recycle wherever possible, compost food waste, and reduce our use of single-use plastics. By doing so, we can reduce the amount of waste that ends up in landfills and pollutes our oceans.

Finally, we must consider the impact of our actions on wildlife. We can do this by not littering, not disturbing wildlife habitats, and supporting conservation efforts. By doing so, we can help protect endangered species and preserve the natural beauty of our planet for future generations.

Are you doing your bit?

12. You don’t stay true to your word.

A person with straight blonde hair, wearing glasses, a white shirt, and a blue knit vest, stands against a peach-colored background. They have one hand raised and the other placed over their chest, appearing to take an oath or pledge.

Your word is your bond, and people rely on you to keep your promises. When you say you’re going to do something, follow through on it. If you don’t, you’re being a pretty rubbish human being.

Do you think before you speak? Before making a promise or commitment, take a moment to consider whether you can realistically fulfill it.

Do you overcommit? It’s better to underpromise and overdeliver than the other way around. Only make commitments that you know you can keep.

And if you realize that you won’t be able to keep a promise, be upfront and honest about it. Apologize and try to make it right in another way if possible.

I think most people would agree that honesty and decency go hand in hand. So if you want to be a decent human being, not a terrible one, do the right thing and stay true to your word.