Is it time to take a break from dating?
Dating. It can be fun, but it can also be exhausting. It can even leave you feeling bitter and cynical about the whole love thing. You’ve been searching for it for so long, so is it even out there?
Of course it is.
But when you get dating fatigue or dating burnout, it’s time to take a break.
Don’t confuse taking a break with giving up.
You don’t have to constantly and continuously search for The One to find them. In fact, this can be counterproductive. You’re not quitting on love by taking a break from dating, and you’re not destined to be alone forever. You’re just switching your focus.
Keep reading to learn why you should take a break.
1. You learn more about yourself.
When you stop focusing on finding a partner, you can put your energy toward rediscovering yourself. You can learn more about who you are when you’re not in a relationship or influenced by a romantic interest.
What are your dreams separate from the life you would have with a potential partner? How can you cheer yourself up and take care of yourself on your own? You learn all these things and more.
2. You learn from your mistakes.
When you’re continuously dating, it can become a routine. You could be constantly repeating the same mistakes without even realizing it. Taking a step back from dating for a while gives you a fresh perspective on the entire experience.
Maybe you always open up too soon, or you constantly talk about your ex. Perhaps you fall for the wrong people or are attracted to those who are emotionally unavailable. In the end, maybe you’ve just been searching in the wrong place. You could realize this during your time off.
3. You stop looking.
We’ve all lost items only to find them the moment we stop looking. This can happen with love too.
In addition, when you stop looking for a perfect match, you start noticing a lot of other things in your life that you could put your energy into instead.
Most importantly, you notice that life can be fun and fulfilling even when you’re not dating anyone or looking to date.
4. You learn what you’re looking for.
After a while of dating with no success, it gets very tempting to simply settle. You lower your criteria bit by bit until you find yourself considering a relationship with someone who is a walking red flag.
Don’t let this happen to you. It is better to be single than in the wrong relationship.
While you’re not dating, you can learn what you’re really looking for in a partner and a relationship. You can set higher standards and define your ideal match and your ideal relationship.
5. You discover new possibilities.
New possibilities open up once you’re out of the dating pool. Don’t forget that you don’t have to be constantly swimming in the pool for someone to push you in out of nowhere.
You could take a break from dating apps and start noticing that people flirt with you in random places and when you least expect it.
You could start going to new places and meeting new people, and one of them might turn out to be your match in the end.
6. Physical intimacy doesn’t cloud your judgment.
Being physically intimate with someone is confusing. It can cloud your judgment and cause complicated situations that didn’t have to happen in the first place. When your mind is not occupied with racy thoughts and the emotions they cause, it can give you a lot of energy to invest in other areas of your life or yourself.
Yes, being physically intimate is also fun, but when you’re not in a serious relationship it’s more confusing and distracting than fun. Take a break from all the tension and use that time and energy to create the life you want. There’ll be plenty of time for it once you’re in a committed relationship.
7. You have more time to work on what you want.
All that time and energy that’s left after taking a break from dating can be put to good use. You can work on your goals, improve yourself, and focus on what you really want in life.
What is it that you want other than a partner? Write all those things down and start crossing them off your list one by one. When you put all that focus that you’ve been using for dating into achieving your dreams, you’ll get all that you want.
8. You learn more about other types of love.
Romantic love is not the only love there is. If you know what to focus on, you might even notice that love is all around you. Love is not gone from your life just because you’re not in a romantic relationship.
You probably love your friends and family members, and you love to see the sunset or to help a stranger on the street. You love the smell of books and the taste of champagne. You love your pet, your plants, your candles, and your collection of vintage records. It could be anything, but there’s surely love in your life already.
Embracing the love that’s already in your life means that when “The One” comes along, you won’t lose yourself in the relationship and sabotage it before it has the chance to reach it’s potential.
9. You see everything more clearly.
When you’re constantly dating, you could be too into it to see the big picture. Once you take a break, you start to see things more clearly. You get a better understanding of your mistakes and yourself. This helps you improve your future dating experience. Your goals and wants become much clearer which will help you eventually find what you’re looking for.
10. You learn more about love.
Have you been jumping from one relationship to another? If so, this might have prevented you from seeing yourself separately from a potential partner. Because of this, you might not even know what true love is.
Give yourself and your partner enough time to grow on your own and experience those butterflies once you finally meet. When you give it time, you learn more about love and how magical it can be.
11. You learn the difference between being alone and lonely.
You don’t have to be lonely just because you are alone. When you take a break from dating, you can start to enjoy your alone time more. You’ll be more aware of yourself and your needs and wants. Use them to make yourself happy and show yourself love.
After all, you can’t meet someone else’s needs if your own needs aren’t met first.
12. You do more with your life.
People often get sucked into their romantic relationships. A lot of their resources go into maintaining that relationship, and since they prioritize it, other aspects of their lives suffer.
When you’re single by choice, you can do more with your life than if you were in a relationship since all of those resources (time, energy, money, effort, attention…) are at your disposal.
For instance, imagine if you put the effort that you put into finding a partner into getting a promotion at work or making a career change. You’d probably have enough resources to get what you want! And if you’re happier in your life, you’re more likely to be happy in a relationship when it comes your way.
13. Love finds you when you’re not searching for it.
It’s funny how we find things once we stop looking for them. This is often how love works for some reason. You’ve got to stop wanting a partner so bad, and once you’re entirely devoted to other things in your life, someone will pop up out of nowhere and give you butterflies.
It just somehow works that way. You can’t purposely go out there and search for love and find it like it’s a hidden treasure and you have a map. It finds you, often when you least expect it.
14. You learn to love yourself.
They often say that you need to love yourself first in order to have love in your life. When you’re entirely devoted to a partner and prioritize them, you put yourself aside more often than you would if you were alone.
Once you take a break from dating, you’ll have more time to show yourself love in whichever way works for you. Maybe you’ll go on a spa day, hit the gym, go shopping, or visit a local gallery. Maybe you’ll stay in bed all day and watch sad movies with your dog. But you’ll prioritize yourself, give yourself what you want, and show yourself the love you deserve.