13 Easy Ways To Stop The Dating Game From Taking Over Your Life

Dating is intense

A woman with long brown hair sits at an outdoor table, gazing thoughtfully at a person sitting across from her. She wears a dark jacket, and a bowl of food and glass bottles are on the table. The background shows a blurred cityscape.

The pursuit of love can take over your life if you let it. It’s important to keep perspective and not get so obsessed with finding “The One” (or anyone) that you lose sight of everything else.

But it’s easier said that done. So what can you do to help?

1. Take your time.

A woman lies on green grass with her hands relaxed above her head. She has a light gray long-sleeve shirt and a watch on her left wrist. Her eyes are open, and she has a peaceful expression on her face.

Take it easy and take your time. You’re not in a rush to get anywhere or do anything. Yes, you want to find a partner for life, but you don’t need to do that ASAP. There’s little to nothing that you really need to do right this instant.

Enjoy just spending your time doing whatever feels right in the moment. Watch a movie, listen to music, take a nap… When you’re off work, you don’t have to achieve something big during your free time. Relax and slow down the time.

2. Fight your FOMO.

A man with short dark hair and a beard is sitting indoors, wearing a striped shirt. He gazes thoughtfully to the side, resting his arms on a table with a cup and a pot of colored pencils nearby. Tulips in a vase are partially visible.

The dating world isn’t all hip and happening. It’s not raining men, and women aren’t waiting for you to put a ring on it. It’s really not as exciting as we think.

There aren’t endless great guys/girls that you’ll miss out on if you take a break from looking for them. There’s nothing major going on in the dating pool while you’re just getting a tan. Most importantly, the clock isn’t running out. A soulmate is never late, nor are they early, they arrive precisely when they are meant to.

3. Prioritize yourself.

A woman wearing a pink sweater and a beige apron holds a paintbrush as she stands in front of an easel in an art studio. She is mixing colors on a palette. The walls are adorned with various colorful paintings, creating a vibrant and creative atmosphere.

You come first. What is it that you want other than a soulmate? Maybe you would like to get fit, quit smoking, buy yourself a new bag, or learn to cook. Do it. Prioritize yourself and your own needs and wants.

Do you want to paint? Buy a canvas and pick up a brush. Do you want a spa day at home? Put on a face mask and light some candles. It’s that simple. Do whatever it is that you want when you’re not in a relationship or busy trying to find one.

4. Focus on your passions.

Two men wearing vintage-style tennis outfits walk on a clay court, carrying wooden rackets. One wears a red jacket and the other a black and white one. Both are smiling and talking, with empty spectator seats in the background.

What are you passionate about? Maybe you like art, sports, or DIY projects. Find what you are passionate about and devote your time to perfecting and enjoying that.

You don’t even have to be good at it; if it makes you happy, do it. If you keep at it, you’ll get better with time. The important part is that you are passionate about something that gives your life meaning and makes you feel fulfilled.

5. Find a hobby.

A woman is sitting at a table embroidering a smiling face on fabric inside a hoop. The table is covered with sewing materials, plush toys, and a smartphone. She is wearing a scarf and concentrating on her work.

You could revisit your old hobbies or start new ones. Don’t hesitate to try things out just to see whether you like them. There are thousands of hobbies to choose from, and they all offer you a sense of meaning and purpose as well as fun quality time that often involves meeting new people with shared interests. One of those hobbies might even lead you to a new romantic interest.

6. Spend time with friends.

Two women are sitting at a table outdoors, enjoying coffee. One woman with long brown hair is wearing a light blue dress and smiling at the other, who has red hair. The background is a dark wooden panel.

When people couple up, they often neglect their friends, family, or other people close to them. Spend time with these people you love and talk about things other than your love lives. Go out, have fun, and joke around—spend quality time with people close to you.

Feel their love for you too. Platonic love is just as important as romantic love. If you don’t have many friends, start meeting new people. Be open to friendships with different types of people, because you can learn something from everyone.

7. Go on vacation.

Three people in a red pickup truck are having a good time. The driver, wearing a cap and red shirt, is smiling. Two passengers are seated beside him, one partially visible. They appear to be enjoying a road trip on a sunny day.

If you can afford it, travel! If you can’t afford it, take a road trip. The important part is that you go on vacation, whether it’s by yourself or with friends. You need to relax from the whole dating scene, and what better way to do that than to experience a change of scenery and possibly meet new people at a new location?

8. Take yourself out.

A woman with shoulder-length dark hair, wearing a cream-colored, ruffled sweater, sits at a wooden table in a cozy, plant-filled café. She holds a green mug with both hands, her eyes closed, and appears to be savoring the warmth and aroma of her drink.

You can go on a date even if you’re not dating anyone. Take yourself out on a date! There’s nothing wrong with getting a table at your favorite restaurant just to treat yourself to a meal that you like. Take yourself out for coffee, or drinks, go to the movies, or do anything else that you would normally do with a date. You’ll realize that it’s fine to do it alone, and if you’re lonely, you can always bring a laptop, magazine, or book.

9. Work on yourself.

A woman practices a yoga pose outdoors on a sunny day with a clear blue sky and clouds in the background. She is wearing a black sports bra and maroon leggings, balancing on one leg with her arms extended, looking peaceful and focused.

Reflect on the areas that you can improve about yourself and work on them. Maybe you could get in shape, learn to be more grateful, get a new haircut, or become more patient. Set goals and work on becoming the best version of yourself. This will also increase your chances of finding quality matches and developing better relationships.

10. Make yourself happy.

A young woman with long hair is sitting cross-legged on a bed, wearing white headphones and singing into a hairbrush. She is enthusiastically gesturing with her arm. The room is decorated with plants and a string of star-shaped ornaments hanging in the background.

What makes you happy? Go shopping, have a spa day, watch your favorite movie, sing karaoke, play a video game, or buy yourself a cake and eat it whole. You are a single adult and this means that you pretty much don’t have to think about anyone other than yourself. Use that to make yourself happy in all the ways that feel right for you.

11. Learn new things.

A person with a braid sits on a yellow couch, holding an electric guitar in one hand and writing on a notepad with a pen in the other hand. They are dressed casually, and a plant is visible in the background.

Rather than spending all your time on the dating scene, take the opportunity to learn new things. Have you ever wanted to learn to play the guitar, speak a foreign language, or dance the tango? There’s no better time than now!

There are thousands of resources where you can learn basically anything you want, and they are either free or very affordable. Don’t forget that learning new things also gives you an opportunity to meet new people.

12. Plan your future.

A woman with long dark hair leans her head on her hand, gazing thoughtfully into the distance. She is wearing a light-colored top and silver earrings, with bracelets on her wrist. The background is blurred, suggesting a peaceful, sunlit setting.

Your plans for the future probably include a romantic partner, but what else do they include? What are your goals when it comes to your professional life, social life, health, finances, education, and anything else where you could improve over time?

Make a plan for your future that is separate from your love life and work on that until the right person comes along to join you.