People who never get played by others display these 12 behaviors

These types of behaviors make someone un-playable.

A man with short gray hair is sitting on a couch. He is wearing a denim button-up shirt and smiling slightly. The background is plain and neutral in color.

Some people are more prone to getting taken advantage of and manipulated, while others are not. And the difference between the two groups is not as complicated as it seems. It mostly comes down to some behaviors that help to guard against malicious actors.

1. They trust, but verify.

Two men are talking on a street. The man facing the camera is smiling and has dark hair with a short beard, wearing a blue t-shirt. The other man's back is to the camera, and he has short brown hair and a beard. Cars and trees are visible in the background.

If someone starts to date a potential match and that person talks about how they have a high-ranking position with a particular company, that’s cool. They’ll accept what they’re told, but will then do recon to confirm it later. By doing so, they’ll find out whether this person is being honest or not.

2. They’re cautious about what information they share, and with whom.

Two women are sitting at a wooden table in a bright cafe, engaged in conversation. One has long blonde hair, wearing a blue shirt, holding a black coffee cup. The other, with light blonde hair in a ponytail, wears a plaid shirt. A potted plant and pastries are on the table.

While some people are open books when it comes to details they share with others, people who never get played keep it that way by being very cautious about spilling info about themselves. They’ll only share information that’s absolutely necessary, and are otherwise vague or strictly boundaried.

3. They’re very guarded with their actions.

Two professionals in business attire stand in front of an elevator. The woman on the right, wearing a light blue suit and holding a black briefcase, faces the camera. The man on the left, in a dark blue suit and holding folders, has his back to the camera.

This is also known as having a “poker face”. People who wear their hearts on their sleeves often have a difficult time remaining stoic or impassive. This can lead others to read their emotions a bit too easily, and thus prey upon them. Unreadable people can’t get played by anyone.

4. They get to know people bit by bit, over time.

Two women sit on outdoor steps, engaged in conversation. Both holding disposable coffee cups, one wears glasses and casual attire, while the other is dressed more formally with sunglasses on her head. A handbag is placed on the steps beside them.

An approach like this is rather like dipping one’s toe into a hot bathtub full of water cautiously, rather than dropping themselves in like a cannonball. By doing so, they can get a feel for people’s true natures behind their initial facades, and thus save themselves from potentially getting burned.

5. They don’t get involved in other people’s drama.

Close-up portrait of a young woman with light brown hair and blue eyes. She is looking directly at the camera with a calm expression. The background is blurred, suggesting an outdoor setting.

Sometimes, those who want to manipulate or take advantage of others seek to draw them in with personal dramas. Then, when they’re enmeshed, they’ll overstep boundaries, use them, and so on. Those who don’t get played by others refuse to get involved in dramas that don’t concern them personally.

6. They listen to their gut instincts.

A person with natural curly hair is looking directly at the camera with a calm expression. They are wearing a red and black checkered shirt and have vibrant red lipstick. The background is slightly blurred, indicating an outdoor setting.

A lot of people dismiss their “gut feeling” about others, especially if they’ve been gaslit in the past and have difficulty trusting their own intuition. That gnawing feeling that things aren’t quite right is essential to pay attention to, so don’t ignore it (especially if others encourage you to do so!).

7. They’re as self-sufficient as possible.

A man helps a young child repair a bicycle in a cozy living room. The man uses a screwdriver on the front wheel, while the child observes intently. The atmosphere is warm and collaborative, with a couch in the background.

Many predatory types prey on the vulnerable, as well as those who don’t have a lot of skills across the board. In contrast, people who are immensely self-sufficient rarely have to rely on anyone else. This all but eliminates the opportunity for others to take advantage of them.

8. They’re observant when it comes to people’s patterns.

Two young girls sitting at a wooden table talking and smiling. One, with long blonde hair wearing a black flowered shirt, faces the other, with short curly dark hair in a maroon hoodie. On the table are glasses of orange juice, a mug, and various snacks.

We all deal with unexpected circumstances on occasion, but when a person constantly uses drama-filled excuses for why they’re late, or can’t pay their share, or need help, then those are red flag patterns to pay attention to. Gullibly choosing to ignore them is likely to lead to one’s personal downfall.

9. They ask other people’s opinions.

Two women sit at an outdoor cafe table, engaged in conversation. One woman, wearing a floral dress and statement necklace, is talking animatedly with gestures. The other woman, in a colorful patterned shirt, is holding a white coffee cup near her mouth.

If they start spending time with someone at the edge of their social circle but feel a bit iffy about them, they’ll ask others how they feel about this person. If they hear the same negative stories from several different individuals, they’ll know to be wary when dealing with them.

10. They respond rationally rather than reacting emotionally.

A man with a serious facial expression and arms crossed stands in an office, listening to a woman holding documents. The woman, seen from behind, is engaged in conversation with him. The office setting includes shelves and industrial-style lighting.

Many master manipulators prey on people’s emotions in order to get what they want, including making others angry or upset and then playing victim about their negative or “hurtful” reactions. That’s difficult to do when a person responds to everything calmly and rationally instead of letting their emotions rule them.

11. They forgive cautiously, and don’t forget.

Two people sit at a table in a café, each holding a drink with whipped cream. The woman on the right is smiling, wearing a striped shirt and scarf, with curly hair. The person on the left is partially visible from the back.

This doesn’t mean that they hold grudges, but rather that although they may forgive someone for a transgression, they’ll be cautious regarding any interactions with that person from now on. Furthermore, they’ll never forget that person’s behavior, as it has set a precedent that they’ll need to be wary about.

12. They keep a paper trail for their own protection.

A man in a light blue shirt sits by a window, writing in a notebook. He appears focused and is wearing a watch, with a calm background of curtains and glass reflecting the scene.

Whether they’re having online interactions, agreeing to job opportunities, or offering to loan people things, they always keep records of these exchanges. Sometimes they’re in actual writing, other times they’re saved emails or screenshots. Essentially, they always collect solid evidence to protect themselves from potential harm or scam attempts.